Tag: Family

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Happy Birthday Jeffrey Andrew!

40 years. It’s been 40 years since you made your debut on this earth. Time has flown by, it never slows down and here is the proof.

I still remember the day you were born so clearly. It was a sunny, hot day in Oklahoma. it was a morning filled with hope, joy and a modicum of fear.

You were perfect, with the exception of the fluid on your lungs. 5 days of uncertainty, with you in the NICU, a doctor telling me that you would never play sports and would always have lung problems.

There have been so many times over the years that I wanted to find that doctor and show him how wrong he was.

After those 5 days you were healthy and happy, and a butterball of a baby. Your smile was infectious and your laugh was a balm.

I love you so much son, I hope you know how proud of you I am. You’re an incredible son, brother, father, man.

Happy Birthday I hope it’s your best one yet!

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Happy Birthday Thomas Alexander Graham Bell!!

I know I don’t write that often anymore, however, I cannot let one of my children’s birthday go by without documenting it here!

I know I tell this story almost every year but the day you were born was amazing. It’s no secret I wanted to have you on the 13th (a good luck day in our family) but my doctor looked at me like I was crazy. That was a Saturday and you were a scheduled C-section. He said no matter how much he liked a patient, unless it was an emergency, he was not coming in on a Saturday.

So the 12th it was, it was sunny and beautiful, a perfect Texas day. Your dad and I were so happy and he was making dad jokes. The nurse asked if this was our first child. We said no and she said we acted like it was. Usually by the time most parents are on that 4th child, yes, we included Michael in that count, they are tired and resigned to another baby.

We were happy to welcome you into our world, it didn’t matter that you were a surprise baby. You were very much wanted and welcomed.

From the start you had an infectious smile and then laugh. You woke with such a big smile that your sister dubbed you mister Sunshine Face.

I do hope you know how much you are loved. I love watching you be a father to your own children. You have grown into an incredible man. I’m so proud of you.

You have a beautiful family, you have earned every ounce of happiness you have in your life.

I love you son, Happy Birthday!

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Musings

I came across a picture recently of my Aunt Lela Evelyn Testerman Dye, Aunt Leona Estelle Testerman Hammer and my grandma, Lela Mae Hammond Testerman.  I give their full names as genealogy matters and I believe it is important to remember peoples names. 

Women give up their names and take their husbands names and blend into that family and there is nothing wrong with that. But they have a whole other name and a life before said husband and children and grandchildren and I think it is important to remember who they were before they took another name.

Having said that, I know I don’t talk a lot about my childhood, but these are my biological mothers sisters and her mother. 

My Aunt Evelyn worked for years for JC Penney, she was a seamstress there, the Oklahoma City location, I believe it was downtown, if I am remembering correctly. Anyway, June, my biological mother, really didn’t have anything to do with the majority of her family.

But she did with Aunt Evelyn, I remember one year she gave me two dresses, they were exactly the same but one was green and one was red. I was roughly 5, I loved those dresses, I wore them all of the time. There came a time I began to get taller, staying the same size. The dresses became way too short, even for that time period. So June took me and the dresses to Aunt Evelyn at her job. She took one look at me in the dresses and instantly came up with a solution. She added a ruffle to the bottom of both, she found material that was an exact color and texture match there in her workshop at JC Penney. I was so happy that day, those were the only dresses I had, hence they were my favorites. Having so little as a child leads to making sure my children had more than a few outfits and shoes in their closets. It is a behavior that also trickles down to my grandchildren. 

Both Aunt Evelyn and Aunt Estelle were strong women who lived through the depression and WWII, they knew about sacrifices and having very little.

They both had wicked senses of humor, a trait they got from their father Wilber Ambrose Testerman. My grandfather, that man had a true Testerman sense of humor. I say that because his brother, Foy John Testerman, the man that would become my father, had the same sense of humor. My grandmother took everything literally and even though she did have a sense of humor it was not like a Testerman. 

I miss all so very much, as the days become shorter and the holidays loom nearer, I become more sentimental. a trait I typically do not have, I am very pragmatic and practical in nature. Well by learned behavior, one becomes practical due to circumstances of life. 

I just wanted to share my aunts with you and keep their names alive. 

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A Blast from the Past

As most of you know I moved almost a year ago, I can’t believe it has been almost a year. I digress, in my new home, the master bathroom has a bluetooth speaker built in the ceiling. 

This morning, as I was getting dressed, I had my phone connected to the speaker. Of course it was full volume, honestly, is there any other way to listen to music? my entire life I have loved loud music, I have no other way of listening to music. 

As the dulcet tones of the Bay City Rollers wafted out of my ceiling my I received a notification on my phone.

In order for me to tell you what the notification was I have to time travel a little so you will understand why it was so funny.

When I was a teenager I loved listening to my music at full volume, much to my parents chagrin. Well, my dad’s, my mom could just turn her hearing aids off and not hear the cacophony that was coming out of my bedroom. My dad was not that fortunate, after many, many times of telling me to turn it down he found a solution.

One day as I was lying across my bed, reading and listening to music, he walked in and handed me headphones. The kind that looks like Princess Leia hair, I looked at him, looked at the headphones and plugged them in and put them on. The look on my dad’s face was worth the deafness I incurred from that event. His eyes widened and he shook his head and walked away.

You see I had not turned the volume down, I had just plugged and played.

I would hear him later recounting that story and he would just say, with a mixture of horror and admiration, she didn’t even turn the volume down.

Fast forward to today, I went to look at the notification and it said your volume is too loud, you might want to think about turning it down.

I looked around and then looked at my phone and said you are not my dad and cannot tell me what to do.

I laughed harder than I should have at my own joke, but it brought a great memory to mind.

Come to think of it, I was probably listening to the Bay City Rollers when that happened with my dad.

I think everyone my age listens to music at full blast, maybe it is a generational thing, maybe it is just an Angie thing. We may never know.

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Thanksgiving Choice

Apparently I have become an object of pity, I don’t even know how this happened. Wait, that’s a lie, I do know how this happened. I did it to myself, I have cultivated a life that is void of any human contact except for work and my children.

I am such a creature of pity that even my ex-husband decided to invite me to Thanksgiving. I politely declined, as I politely declined every Thanksgiving invitation.

Why you ask, its simple, Thanksgiving is family time and I don’t have one. Yes, I have my children, but at Thanksgiving they are purely their dad’s children. I gave up any thanksgiving rights a long time ago. I will not be reclaiming any of them, I refuse to go somewhere that I feel awkward.

My parents are gone, I am adopted, my siblings never saw me as real, so their families don’t see me as real. One brother is gone, the other is in a nursing home and my sister has her own family and I’m not real anyway. So I would not e spending any holidays with anyone who thinks I’m not real.

I have cousins, but they have their own families, once again the awkward thing comes into play. Its one of the reasons I don’t go to many family reunions. Because they all have shared experiences and memories and well I wasn’t there and it’s awkward. So I stay away, I’ve never remarried, so I’m alone, with a dog and a cat.

Its fine, I did it to myself and i’m good with it, for the record I had 4 invitations to Thanksgiving dinner, but they are not my family and well awkward. When you are with family you relive stories and catch up and you don’t really want a stranger sitting there with nothing to offer. It is really for the good of all I don’t show up to anything. I tried a few times and I always feel like the lone person out. So I stopped going to anyones home for a family affair.

Apparently I am an object of pity now, so old that no one would ever want me for a life partner, I mean men my age are demanding and getting much younger women, and my children are their fathers children on Thanksgiving. I would never dream of insinuating myself into that situation.

I feel it would be disrespectful to his wife, this is her show and she should be front and center in this family holiday.  Her husbands ex-wife should never show up for a family holiday. My daughter pointed out that we all get together at Easter, but this is at my son’s home. Not theirs, if it were at theirs I would not show up, because it would be disrespectful and here’s that word again, awkward.

I write all of this not for anyone to feel sorry for me but because I need to get it out, I need to expunge my feelings in writing.

I have no regrets about my life and the way it turned out, i’d do almost everything over again. I’d only change one small thing and I think we all know what that is.

So Happy Thanksgiving, if you have family and are with them, cherish it, I wish I had known the last time was the last time I would have a real family Thanksgiving. I think I would have cherished it more, I would have saved every minute in my memory bank so I could bring it out and relive it.

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Elizabeth Anne Got Married

My hands are finally untied, I can talk about the thing I was forbidden to talk about for so long. My daughter got married! Yes, Elizabeth Anne got married Friday, December 5, 2014 at roughly 2:30 pm. It was a simple ceremony witnessed by her closest friends and family and her precious cows and chickens oh and can’t forget the donkeys; they were in attendance as well.

So happy her Aunt Rena and Grandpa Reno and Grandma Mike could be there, it was good to see them again and I do know that Rena is one of Elizabeth’s favorites, don’t tell the rest. Shhhhhhh, our secret.

The bride was beautiful in a simple knee length hi-low dress, it was cream-colored lace, and with the addition of cowboy boots it was perfect for the setting. She is beautiful to begin with, her friend Chelsea did her hair and makeup and she was radiant.

With the hard work of her dad’s wife, the affair was perfect and went off without a hitch. Before you can scratch your head, the wedding was on their property with the reception in their party barn. And yes, as mother of the bride I took a huge step back and allowed this to happen as she does a lot for my children, even though they were grown when she arrived on the scene.

She did an amazing job, from the food to the decorations; I honestly cannot find one fault with anything she did. Elizabeth Anne is not a planner so this took a lot of stress off of her, to which I am grateful.

Jay Renee Photography did the photos, and yes I have an in with the owner of that fine business, Jason is the son of my friend Sandi. We would NEVER have trusted anyone else with this function; he is an amazing photographer and part of our family.

I am so happy with the turnout, how many people could come on a Friday afternoon, so happy my BBFF could make it. Sad my nephew Chris could not, but understandable as his fiancé was having some medical issues. It was right he was there to take care of her; I know he was there in spirit. Sad also Miss Jan could not be there as she has known Elizabeth Anne since, well before she was born, however, she was busy taking care of her daughter who had medical issues. Which we totally understood, a mother’s children come first. That is the way it should be.

It doesn’t seem real, my baby married, it is so adult, for the life of me I can’t figure out how she even got a marriage license due to the fact she is only 5 years old. At least that is what it feels like; time went by exceedingly fast, warp speed it you will.

feel like there is so much more I need to tell her, however, when I think about it, there is nothing left to impart, as I talk a lot and she has heard all of my words of wisdom. I say wisdom; she says insanity, tomato, potato, whatever.

I look forward to this new chapter in her life, to watch her grow even more, I look forward to our family growing with the addition of a new son-in-law and the daughter he brings with him. Nothing but goodness and mercy shall follow them all the days of their life together.

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Ramblings

I know it’s been a little bit since I have posted, I am among the living, I have a lot in my head and some of it cannot be articulated in public.

I was so sick last week I did not get to see Captain America when it opened, I am going tomorrow, then I can watch last Tuesdays episode of S.H.I.E.L.D., it’s crazy that I did not have the energy or health to go see one of my favorite superheroes in action.

But I am better now and will go tomorrow, why tomorrow you ask, well today is Ladies that Lunch, yesterday was the family dinner.

I am enjoying the Friday night dinners we are having, last night Jeffrey got to choose the menu. It was pork chops, fried okra, corn on the cob, homemade bread and cheesecake for dessert.

I am still full, I think everyone may be full today from last night; Elizabeth even took home a bag full of scraps for her birds. I can’t wait to see how they enjoyed their treat.

I am full of mixed emotions, on one hand I am excited to see what my future holds, another hand is filled with pity for our customers and techs who will no longer have us to rely on when the first level fails them. The other hand (if I were an octopus this would work out) I am disappointed with management, in the way they are behaving, some, not all, it is disheartening to see people gleeful with trying to fire employees. My other octopus hand is disgusted with the Union, they make false claims, refuse to help people, who have paid dues to them for years and will be taking 6% (I hear from a reliable source) of employees severance pay, they consider it a bonus. I have never known severance to be a bonus, this is unconscionable, I do hope my source was incorrect in this. I guess I’ll find out for sure next month when the first person gets their severance check.

My spirits remain high and hopeful that the path I am supposed to take will reveal itself in the right time, God never let’s me down or leaves me dangling. I know that I will have something fantastic when this job comes to an end for me.

The Irishman gets to pick the next Friday night dinner and he has requested steak, we need a grill, so I will be looking to see who has a good one at a good price. I do love a deal! I am thinking steaks, baked potatoes, salad and lots of laughter and good conversation.

The one thing I am praying for, and would like everyone to pray for this, is I get something with a schedule that I can still pick up Tessa from school every other Friday and get off early enough that I can pick her up in the summer so we can have daylight hours together. We love going to the pool together and going to get donuts and just laughing. Being with her is the highlight of my weeks, having everyone here for biweekly dinners is nothing short of awesome. So, that is my prayer, that I get to keep those things.

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Happenings

Sometimes in life people mistake niceness for weakness, I do believe that people are crazy when they do that. It takes real strength to be nice to certain people; I refuse to go to hell because some people cannot control their idiocy.
Make no mistake, I will not allow you, and you all know who you are, to take advantage of me or demean me in any way. I will, and have, reported you to the proper department within the major corporation I work for. Trust me, I left nothing out; you will be taken to task.

Enough of that, today was recording day with Shanon J, I am so proud of the work we are doing; it is nothing short of awesome. I hope you all are listening and enjoying the topics we are covering. If you are new, the website is http://www.convosate.com, you can listen to previous shows and leave feedback.

I am still recovering from my feeding frenzy at the family reunion, everything was so amazingly good. It’s hard to say no to family members giving you food, one simply does not do that. I love food, I admit it, I should have been born with a tapeworm or something. Instead I was born into the body of a farm worker, short and steady, close to the ground to do farm work. It is so frustrating, all I want is to be beautiful and thin, instead I am plain, short and squatty. Not a great combination when one lives in Plano, TX, perhaps if I lived in a farm state then I would fit in. oh well, one works with what they have, so therefore I wear spanx and makeup. Fixes a lot of issues that I have, heels help with the vertical issue that I have. Other than that all is good here deep in the heart of Texas.

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My Crazy Weekend

The Family reunion has come and gone and I am extremely happy that I went. I saw cousins that I didn’t know existed and cousins that I hadn’t seen since last year and some I had seen in between reunions. I was happy to see my Aunt Laura Faye there; she has become the heart of our family, the elder that we all look toward for stability, guidance and at times discipline. I am happy to report she was good, a little emotional at times, to be expected, this is her first reunion since her beloved husband passed away. However, she showed what she is really made of, sugar, spice and a spine of steel, she didn’t let the younger cousins get away with much, imparting wisdom and love all at once. We are lucky to have her in our family, I look at her as see what my Uncle saw in her, strength, beauty, intelligence all with a sense of humor.
I was happy to see my cousin Sherry come with her husband, even if it was for a little bit, I was sad my cousin Pat could not come. He was sorely missed; I don’t know if he realizes how much everyone thinks of him. He is a truly good man, Pat if you read me you better come next year. I told everyone I tried to talk you into coming! Cousin Cindy can cook, and it’s good!
I ate my way through the weekend; I ate brisket, fried pies, cookies, potato salad, chilidogs and everything else I could see. I totally forgot to be on a diet, it is a good thing I don’t live near these people, I would be 800 million pounds, I would not be able to fit on the campground if I lived near them.
Seeing all of the younger children run and play and get reacquainted from the year before brought back memories of all of my cousins coming to my grandma and grandpas house. I used to love it when they would come, the whole house would fill with shrieks of laughter, and just busyness. I miss those days, I look back on them with the eyes of the child I was. I can see them all so clearly, my grandpa, always smiling, eyes permanently crinkled in laughter. My grandma telling us kids that she was going to be on us like a duck on a June bug if we didn’t behave. Aunt Effie, whose very name invokes peace, calm, tranquility, if a child was in distress she was there with a comforting word.
There is a world that no longer exists that I will never forget, when I sit very still and close my eyes I am transported to. I am so happy to be connected to my family again; I missed them all so very much.
Don’t get me wrong, I loved my mom and dad an inordinate amount, and loved the life I had in Owasso. It was the best thing that happened to me and took my life in a direction that it would not have gone otherwise.
That does not lessen my happiness with being back with my cousins and it does not take away from what I felt for my mom and dad. Turns out I can have the best of both worlds.

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Time Travel Tammi and Independence Day

I was going to write about what it means to me to be an American today, however, I have been sidetracked by something I heard on the radio this morning. I was listening to my friend Shanon on KHVN and they posed the question, if you could go back in time when would you go. Of course, with today being the 4th of July, I said I would go back to this date in 1776 and witness the birth of our nation. Then I thought about it some more, I would go back to when my parents were alive and I was still at home. 4th of July was so fun with them, the house was full of family, friends and food, the yard was filled with more of the same just add some fireworks. Black Cats, sparklers and bottle rockets filled the air with a sense of fun, danger and camaraderie, all at once.
Of course my best friend Tammi was present, we were always together in those days, if she was not at my house I was at hers. I think mine was a bit more fun though, on the 4th at least, with the bustling activity and all of the people. My parents loved having a full house, filled with laughter and of course giving all glory to God. God always came first in our home, my parents always made sure that we gave thanks for everything. What a great example.
I think those days is the reason I gave up all 4th of July’s with my children after the divorce, their father had a lake house and he filled it with people. The kids always had fun and loved going, it was not a hardship to see their eager looks when the time was nearing. They still spend the day with their dad and on the lake. They were and continue to be true water people; they totally got that from their dad.
Now I work on the 4th of July, I think I do it, well the money is good, but I really do it so I won’t be reminded of how empty the day is for me now. With no family near me, no house full of people, it makes it a little more palatable to be at work.
I hope everyone has a great day, tune into my friend on KHVN 97 AM in Dallas/Fort Worth, she is just fantastic, and the music is incredibly uplifting.