Positive Thoughts

I am over my irritation, I vented to BFF and BBFF, I feel better. It’s Friday and I have had my first Peppermint Mocha of the season, I am feeling mellow.
I have decided to focus on the positives in my life today. So, here goes my positive thoughts flung into the universe.
First, I am positive I have the best children on the face of the planet, along with the best granddaughter. I am completely biased in this opinion, as every parent should be.
I have a fiancĂ© that thinks I’m kinda ok, of that I’m positive.
I have a great job, where I get to work with some pretty terrific people. That is not sarcasm, I don’t have a degree and I have a high paying, highly technical job. I get to help people all day and ensure that they keep in contact with their loved ones. All in all I call that a good job.
I have rediscovered my cousins and aunts and uncles and that makes my soul joyous.
I have a great friend who had so much confidence in me that she put me on the radio. I am having the best time doing Conversations.
In conclusion I have a lot to be grateful for and positive about.

Irritated Yet Again

I am so relieved there were no camera phones around when I was a teenager. I am so happy every single, stupid thing I did was not recorded for posterity.
There are a few things floating around Facebook these days I take umbrage with.
I read something today that said if you blow off your freshman and sophomore years in high school your GPA will be crap and you will end up working for craptastic wages.
It is no secret I partied my way through high school, and while my grades weren’t the worst in school, they were not what they should have been given my intellect.
I didn’t go to college until after my divorce, even then, I didn’t finish. I do not have a degree, yet I can hold my own at dinner parties. I do not have a craptastic job. I have a high paying job, I probably make more than the person who posted that entry on Facebook.
I don’t say this to brag, I say this to let you know to never judge. Sometimes it takes people a while to find their way in life. Those hard partying teens could end up having a highly specialized skill.
Don’t get me wrong, I would love to go back to school and finish my journalism degree. I would also love to write a book, however I am not really that great at plotting.
I in no way advocate teenagers living a party life, I do believe my main point is not everyone without a college degree is making crap wages and can actually form a sentence.
Some comments I have seen from the “highly educated” people contain spelling and grammar errors in abundance. Perhaps they slept through their English classes.
I’m really just disgusted right now, I feel judged, simply due to the fact I didn’t go to college right out of high school and when I did go, I didn’t complete my degree.

Jeffrey

So today is Jeffrey’s birthday, 28 years ago he made his appearance, what a beautiful baby he was. We were so happy to welcome him to the world, the doctors told his dad that he looked like a Japanese tourist due to the fact he had so many cameras and was snapping so many pictures.
It was a scary first few days with you son, you were born with water on your lungs and we were told at one point that you would always have lung issues. That you would never run or play sports like other children. You so totally proved them wrong.
You grew to be a healthy, active little boy, not only running but playing sports as well.
I am so proud of the man you have become, the way you are with your daughter is a wonderful thing to watch. I can’t wait to celebrate your birthday with you.

Sad Realization

It’s official, there are certain things I am too old for, Cosmopolitan magazine, Glamour magazine, sparkle eyeshadow and the VMA’s. watching Miley Cyrus twerk, grind and gyrate her way into the night left me shocked and saddened.
The upside was the shot of the shocked looks on Will Smith and his children. Apparently I was not the only one left in stunned disbelief.
I found myself more interested in the offerings of the discovery channel. Sad but true. I am getting old and it is obvious to, well, me.
This weekend was a busy one, I took Tessa to Samantha’s birthday celebration. It was a hit, Sweet and Sassy treated those girls to a makeover and runway extravaganza. So much fun to watch all of those little girls giggling, singing and dancing. Glitter was the theme of the day, the girls were sparkly and adorable. After we left Tess spied the indoor playground in the mall and of course we had to stop. Then she spied the toy store, I am such a pushover.
Then it was date night with the Irishman, we went to see The Worlds End. Loved it, a must see for Simon Pegg fans. If you have never seen Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz I highly recommend them. See those movies then see this one.
It’s Monday, must drink the rest of my coffee.

Perfect Day

Anybody else tired today? I am beyond exhausted, I need a week in the mountains to get some rest, maybe 20 hours of sleep, that sounds lovely, however I have a busy weekend so no major amounts of sleep in my near future.
Wednesday was a total Tessa day, we kicked it off with a movie and chocolate donuts washed down with chocolate milk. Then pool time, there were 4 other children there that they were all ages 9 to 5. Perfect, she had a blast and we ended up staying there for 3 hours! Then back to more donuts and milk, getting cleaned up for shopping for Samantha’s birthday party.
We get to the store, I explain she would pick out the toy and I would pick out the outfit. She tells me “Gigi, I think we should get Samantha 2 toys.” I said um ok. She then said “and we should get me two toys too.” Which we did.
It wasn’t until later, while looking at the receipt I see one of Tessa’s toys was over $30.00! She has expensive tastes.
Then it was off to Old McDonald’s (her name for McDonalds) where we met a little girl that was just her age and size. They bonded like crazy! The term fast friends comes to mind. They had the best time and did not want to part from each other! I had to explain that Tessa doesn’t live in this city. But when she comes to visit me we will go back to that McDonald’s in the hopes of seeing Lili again.
It was a perfect last day together before school starts next week.

Irritated… Again

It is a total coffee morning and Big Al Mack just said every stripper he knows is in college. Well then, that woke me up, I fell asleep early last night and slept hard. Made up for Sunday night, when I didn’t sleep at all, well, once, then woke up screaming.
Ok,so, there is a news story that makes me so angry I could spit. It is a case where a woman gave her child up for adoption, the birth father contested it and was given his child. Key words there, his child, blood, birth, family. The adoptive parents want the baby back, no, not baby at this point, child. This whole case makes me physically ill, the father of this child wants her, period, end of story.
That should have been the end of the story, but it’s not, for whatever reason the South Carolina courts have finalized am adoption that should not have happened in the first place.
The adoptive parents are in the wrong, I understand how painful it is when you are adopting and the birth parent says no, I want my baby. I have seen this happen, it is brutal, however when a person sets out on the adoption path they are told this could happen.
At this point I have very little sympathy for the adoptive parents, to me they are not a sympathetic people.
They have hired a PR firm, they have ties to the superior court judge, who finalized the adoption after the child went to her birth father (just a note adoptions are not superior court issues), they continually speak to the press.
The birth father on the other hand, serves in the Oklahoma National Guard, and does not speak to the press, nor does any member of his family.
My personal opinion is leave this child alone, if you have this kind of time and money you could have adopted several children that actually need a good home. That have no parents that want them, go forth, help a child that needs it!

Prude?

So, on my twitter feed someone had retweeted a Cooper Hefner tweet. He was tweeting an interview that a London paper had done with him. His tweet inferred that the journalist was biased. Curious me, I read the article, and yes, while I do believe that the journalist already had her mind made up before the interview. However, Jr hardly helped himself during said interview.
During the interview he inferred that if one is religious they are a prude. Well that is what I want to address. I am religious, I am no prude, however I have a clear cut view on what I believe is right and what is wrong.
It is wrong for 10 year old girls to wear the playboy bunny emblazoned on their behinds. It is wrong for them to wear the charms, have purses or anything else that depicts this image. Why you ask, well, let me tell you, playboy is pornography, is this really what we want our daughters promoting at a young age?
I believe it is wrong for Target to sell certain books on their shelves, I believe it’s wrong for Robin Thicke’s uncensored Blurred Lines video to be on YouTube. Anyone can access it, it needs to be NC17, I don’t think children should be able to access it, yet there it is.
We are, as a society, so intent on proving our non prudishness that we have gone to the extreme.
Some things should be adult only, it should be left behind the counter in a brown wrapper.
You don’t have to be a prude or religious to know that out children are being over exposed to things that should be for adults. This is not the only generation to do this, it had been going on for a few decades now.
The end result is we now have 18 year old girls whose main goal in life is to be a 80 year old mans trophy, or to be featured in a certain magazine.
Teach your daughters about their brains, develop that as well as teaching them they are beautiful.
When I was little my grandfather was teaching me to read, my grandmother told him I was pretty therefore I didn’t need to know how to read. He laughed, she walked off, he then looked me in the eyes and told me ” listen well, you are pretty, but that will only get you so far in life, your mind will take you wherever you want to go. Develop that and it will last you a lifetime.”
I never forgot his words, I take a lot of pride in my looks, and am obsessed by them, but I take a greater pride in my intellect. Give that gift to your daughters instead of a bunny emblem.

Tribute to Kidd

Last night was the public memorial for Kidd Kraddick, I was able to attend. I am so happy I went to say see you later to this great man.
J-Si said it best when he said that he had heard from people that said they didn’t understand why they were grieving so hard when they had never met Kidd. He told us that we did know him, how he was on air was exactly the man he was in his “real” life. There was nothing faked for ratings, he was who he was.
It is no surprise that a man who showed us every morning how large his heart was would pass from an enlarged one.
The tribute was perfect, his daughter sang, I believe her dad would be extremely proud of her. She has grown to be poised and self assured. We, who have been listening for a long time, have watched her grow up. Or rather, heard her grow up, from bath time with Caroline to listening to her in the car on her way to school. Seeing her honor her father in song was incredibly heartbreaking and joyous all at the same time.
My friend Pam and I took the train downtown to pay our respects. I am grateful she went with me, she is also a fan so it was nice to be there with someone who understood. We had a Kidd worthy adventure, especially getting home. If you are a listener you will get that reference.
I got home way later than my normal bedtime, loss of sleep well worth it.

Electric Light Orchestra

Coming to work early in the mornings the radio is my best friend. This morning I heard Strange Magic by Electric Light Orchestra. This made me incredibly happy, as I belted out the lyrics at the top of my lungs I reflected on my history with E.L.O.
Being an orchestra brat, loving string instruments this band was a revelation. They introduced me to a whole new way of playing. I didn’t know my bass could produce such sounds.
They had a bass that was painted purple and glittered. I wanted to paint mine so bad, however I was not allowed to.
Music feeds my soul, when I am down certain songs can lift me up, certain songs can reflect whatever I am feeling at the moment. I cannot imagine this world without music. The thought is too depressing.
It is a new week and a new opportunity to live life. I would say get out of your homes and see what’s out there, however, it is still hot as hades out there. So maybe you can do something meaningful indoors.

Happy Anniversary Mom

August 11, 2003, ten years, it’s been 10 years since my mom went home. I cannot believe it has been that long, in the grand scheme of things it is a relatively short amount of time.
I still miss her, I miss her wisdom, I miss her acceptance, I miss her heart and I miss her soul. Being around my mother made one want to be a better person, not because she demanded it, but because her innate goodness shone through, I have never met another person like her. I have met some that their hearts reminded me of my mother, but none that their souls reminded me of her.
My most favorite thing to do with her was just to sit; we would sit on the recliner couch and say nothing. Just hold hands, in silence, you could feel her stillness, the peace her soul had, and you wanted it. I have never been able to attain her level of peace, I don’t know anyone else who has had it either.
When I lost her, I lost my touchstone, I lost the last person on earth that loved me for me, not what I could do for them, I lost the one person on earth who never judged me and simply accepted who I am.
It’s a terrible thing to lose ones mother before they are ready, I wasn’t ready; I was still young and needed her. Even though I was an adult and a mother myself, I wasn’t ready; I didn’t want to be alone in life.
However, God had different ideas, He wanted her home, she was ready to go home, to be with her love, my dad. He passed 10 years before her and she was more than ready to go be with him, she missed him more than I was going to miss her.
It is impossible to talk about her without mentioning him; she had been in love with him since she was 5 years old. She would call him daddio; I loved hearing her say that. The way she said the word, it was filled with her love for him. Even after 59 years of marriage she would still look at him with unwavering adoration. That kind of love doesn’t come around often and not everyone gets to have it.
So mom, I hope you are enjoying the anniversary of your home coming, I still miss you all the time. However I look forward to being there with you one day, I can’t wait to tell you how you influenced me, in ways that I didn’t even know until I was older. I am still discovering things about myself even now, thank you for being my favorite mom.