Normalcy and Ally McBeal

Getting over the flu has not been easy, this past week I have been, well weak. I almost passed out twice in the shower, I don’t know if it was a combination of the heat and the steam or what. But today, I feel actually stronger than I have in a while.

Next week I will be back to my regular schedule, which includes working out. I am also doing my meal prep today, for the first time in quite a while.

This will consist of lemon pepper chicken, couscous and broccoli for lunch. Dinner will be salmon, sweet potato and broccoli. I am a creature of habit, since I don’t like cooking, making the same thing is easy for me. No, I don’t get bored, in fact I am a fan of sameness.

I really haven’t eaten a lot since getting sick, nothing has tasted good, that could account for the weakness last week.

I finally received my Doterra Cleanse package, I will be starting after my birthday. I really don’t feel like having a birthday celebration in the middle of a cleanse. It seems cruel, to myself, since I am not in the mood to be cruel to myself, after my birthday it is.

Back in the 1990s to early 2000s there was a show called Ally McBeal. I am going to admit I didn’t watch a lot of this show, just a once in a while kind of thing. When the shows I did watch were on hiatus and this was the only thing on that I hadn’t seen. This was in the days before streaming was around.

There is one episode that I saw that has stuck with me, after all this time, I still remember it. Ally had a client that wanted to be in a coma, she wanted to be medically induced. She wanted to live her life out in the coma, as her dream world was way better than her real life world.

She was older, she had never married and never had children, but in her dream world she was married, had children and even grandchildren.

She wanted to live in that world for the rest of her days. So off to court they go, with Ally leading the charge to enable her client to live out the rest of her life in a dream world.

I don’t remember the outcome of the episode, it was the premise that has stuck with me all of this time.

I live a lot in my head, and truth be told, what is in there, at times, is much better than what is out here.

Well, that used to be the case, not so much anymore, my real life is amazingly good these days.

But before April 2017, it was bad, and I did live a lot in my head and that life was imminently better that was going on in the real world. If faced with the opportunity to live in a coma or continue on in the world I was in at the time, I have to wonder what my decision would have been.

Considering I have amazing children and a granddaughter that very literally hung the moon, I would have chosen not to be in the coma.

However, if I didn’t have children or a granddaughter and the rest had been going on, I would have chosen the coma. A coma would have been preferable to what was going on in my life.

I do have a tendency to live a lot in my head, in my books and through my television shows. I don’t live a lot in the real world, I honestly don’t want to, people are not nice in the real world. In my head I can be interesting and beautiful, in the real world I am lesser than that.

The more I think about it the more I am convinced that I really won’t date again, simply due to the fact that there is no one that can stand up to what I believe Dean Cain is. I realize how crazy that sounds, and yet I don’t care.

If you have any comments or suggestions please feel free to leave them here or email me at Peace out peeps.


Flu and Dean Cain

It has been a long road to recovery, just for the record, I have not had the flu since 1994. Let that sink in folks, 1994, now 2018, it did me in, not literally, well, yes, literally. I did everything right, I wash my hands, I have antibacterial hand crap, I have Clorox wipes at my desk and yes, I use all of it. I still contracted the flu, and it was not pleasant.

I honestly thought it was a head cold, or sinus infection, when I went to the doctor and the nurse practitioner told me it was the flu you could have knocked me over with the proverbial feather.

I exclaimed, shut the door! She burst out laughing and said no one had ever reacted that way before. They probably won’t after me, I am unique.

Then she said it was too late for tamiflu, which is ok with me, as I don’t know what is in that stuff.

I combated the horrendous mess with oregano oil, tea tree oil, lemon oil, black elderberry stuff and peppermint. I also did the Tylenol for cold and sinus. Lots of liquids, not a lot of food, I wasn’t hungry, which is a great side effect. FYI.

But now, now that I am on the mend I have a giant fever blister on my upper lip.

I always know when the illness has left my body, or stress, because I get a giant fever blister.

I hate those things, with a passion, they are painful and ugly. So very ugly.

I still have a lingering cough as well, not too bad, but it’s there.

Since I have been housebound, I did manager to catch up on several streaming shows I have been wanting to watch. The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel on Amazon, The Handmaid’s Tale on Hulu and Stranger Things on Netflix, they are all very good and very different from each other.

I am incredibly eclectic in my television viewing, you might not be, if you are into Sci-Fi, Stranger Things is what you want. If you liked The Hunger Games, The Handmaid’s Tale is for you. Gilmore Girls fans, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel is the cup of tea you are looking for.

I am now dying to find out what happens next on each of these and their new seasons aren’t out yet!

The most amazing thing happened this morning people, Dean Cain, yes, the real Dean Cain, liked my tweet! Again!

I am one step closer to meeting him, and having him fall madly in love with me and then we get married.

Stop! It could happen! I’m not crazy, my mother had me tested. That is my mantra, once again, I’m not stupid and I know it’s not going to happen, but what if it did. Who would be the crazy one then?

On a happier note, I feel better today than I have in over a week and will be returning to work tomorrow.

I had a party to go to tonight, but I won’t be able to do that and I am not happy about it. I was looking forward to it and even had the perfect pair of boots picked out. Oh well, there is always next time.

As usual, if you have any comments, especially any essential oils that will make the fever blister go away, feel free to leave them here or shoot me an email.

Things I’m Angry About Right Now

There are a couple of things that have me really angry right now. Angry isn’t the right word, you know what, it’s old fashioned pissed off.

First off, I have not been sick in years and now I have a low grade fever, sinus something, I don’t even know what, coughing and I am losing my voice. I am doing oregano oil, frankincense oil, lemon oil, geranium oil, eucalyptus oil and hot lemon and honey. Add the Tylenol extra strength night time cold plus medication and it is way pleasant right now.

I even did a bought in my sauna with the eucalyptus oil, all I did was get sweaty, I thought I would sweat this stuff out, no dice. I have even tried the faceblaster, it is supposed to be great when it comes to sinus issues.

I may have to break down and go to the doctor. I hate going to the doctor, I have to literally be on death’s door before I will go. Oh add vitamin D to that list.

That’s the first thing, the second thing is a little for egregious, in my opinion.

I talk about this all of the time, this is not a huge secret, I am adopted, I was adopted by my great aunt and uncle. Great being the operative word in so many areas, but in this instance, age. I have stated before my dad was born in 1911 and my mom was born in 1913. This is not a secret. I have two nephews older than I, my siblings are way older, 28, 24 and 20 years older. Not a secret, my brother that just passed in August was a great-grandfather, again, not a secret.

So then why am I getting this whole oh I thought the person you call your nephew was your cousin crap. When I say um his mom is my sister, this person acted like they didn’t believe me. Would you like to see my adoption papers? I was legally adopted, I have the papers, I also have my birth certificate saying who my parents are. They match my siblings.

This is the kind of stuff I grew up with, oh it’s Angie, she isn’t real, kind of crap. I don’t need that from a near stranger, we might have gone to the same school, in the same hometown, but apparently you don’t know me at all.

Yes, this person acted like they didn’t believe me when I said my sister is my sister. Oh, she’s so much older than us, me: I was adopted. Her: oh I know but still. But still what? Why would I lie about that? Seriously, this is not something one says to an adoptee. My sister is my sister, my nephews and my neice are my mine, my brothers are my brothers. I have the paperwork to prove it, just in case anyone is interested.

We may not talk every day, but I love them all, with my whole heart. So to come at me like that, so not cool. Oh I deleted that person off of my Facebook, I don’t need that kind of person knowing anything about me.

Thanks for listening, this has been a fever induced rant, but it has been brewing for a few weeks.

As usual, comment here or at Until next time, peace, love and gossip. Extra points for anyone who knows where that line comes from.

My Thoughts on Today

I was going to write about some things I have recently tried and loved and then I remembered it is Martin Luther King jr., day.

Here in the United States of America that means we take pause today to honor a great American who believed in equality for all. Not for the few, not for certain religions, not for certain skin colors, for ALL.

Now that is something I can get behind, equality for all, I like that, I do believe, with my whole heart it is something the majority of Americans wants as well.

I grew up in a non-racist household, what that means is my parents taught me to judge what is on the inside, not the outside. Having said that, I will tell you my dad was prejudiced, he was a product of his generation in many ways, having been born in 1911 this is to be expected.

My dad had no issues with people of a different skin color getting to vote, getting the same pay for the same job, being friends with people of a different skin color. He did not believe that we should intermarry. That is the only thing he had issues with. I am sure if he lived longer or had lived in a different time, he would have seen things differently.

My mother, who outlived him by 10 years, did change her opinion on this as she met and became friends with people of a different skin color.

I believe if people are exposed to different cultures and different ethnicities they will begin to think differently.

I don’t believe in the whole “race” thing, we are all one race, the human race. We might look differently and speak differently and think differently, but inside, where it genuinely counts, we all want the same thing. For this world to be better for our children, to be able to feed, clothe and shelter our families in a dignified manner.

I believe that if we all united and refused to be drawn into the “race” wars, we would defeat the real enemy.

When we stop looking at each other and fearing skin color, religion, region or accents, then we can truly stop the hate.

The hate that Martin Luther King jr. wanted to stop so many years ago. Today, of all days of the year, the way we can honor him is to truly stop giving our attention to the ones that want to divide us. Stop looking for differences and start looking for the sameness in all of us. A desire to elevate our children higher than we climbed, a desire to live in peace, a desire to truly love one another.

As a Christian all I can do is look to what Jesus said in John 13:34 “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.”

No room for hate in my heart if I follow that commandment, which I try my best to do on a daily basis. Someone recently told me that they know someone is truly bad if I don’t like them, because I like everyone. I do try and find something positive in every person around me, if I can’t find anything positive about you, it has nothing to do with your skin color. It has everything to do with your character.

If you have any comments, criticisms or really anything you want to say to me, you can do so here in the comments or email me at

Happy Anniversary Foy and Odela

January 13, one of my favorite days of the year, why, you ask, well I’m glad you did. It is the day that started everything, January 13, 1934, Foy and Odela went to the Justice of the Peace and promised in front of God and everyone to love, honor, be faithful, loyal and remain true to one another for a life time.

That they did, with a dignity and grace that is rarely seen these days. I know I have a tendency to romanticize things from my childhood, but these are the two humans I don’t have to exaggerate or give them qualities that they didn’t possess.

They were and continue to be my model for what true, romantic love looks like. They were the epitome of sharing, caring, laughter, love and discipline. They were truly perfect in my eyes, they always will be.

They lived through some of the hardest times this country has ever seen and came out without any bitterness or anger. They loved this country fiercely, just as fiercely as they loved one another.

My parents didn’t have to adopt me, they chose to, it was a daunting task, taking in a pre-teen with a bad attitude. They did, the attitude changed, the stubbornness did not, They told me they had no regrets, I believe them, the last words my mother ever said to me was I had been the best surprise.

I miss them every day of my life.

Today, on what would be their 84th anniversary, I know that it is truly special as they now have their youngest son with them to celebrate. I have said before, I don’t believe they are looking down on me and their other children left here on earth. Some things would make them sad, and there is no sadness in heaven, and trust me, those two are in heaven. There is no doubt in anyone’s mind that my parents ended up anywhere else.

So there they are, in heaven, having a coconut cake to celebrate. My brother is there to help them eat the cake today, I know that makes the celebration that much sweeter.

First Product Review of 2018

Here it is folks, the thing you have been waiting for, my first product reviews for 2018. BBFF nothing for you here, all girly things today.

I have two things to review and I am beyond excited about both of them.

First up we have Mary Kay’s time wise repair lifting bio-cellulose lifting masque. I have to be honest, I love a good mask, especially one that promises me a more youthful look. The exact promise is this: “See a visible lift in just two weeks* with this luxuriously innovative, Korean beauty-inspired mask. Great to use before special occasions!”

Now, I have used this twice now, I didn’t want to do a one time thing and then tell you how it felt.

I can tell you this, I did see visible results, my skin felt tighter without being dry, my skin tone was improved and the lines around my mouth decreased. They have already decreased due to diligent use of the face blaster, but this definitely added to it. I loved the way it felt as well, it went on cool, I could feel the moisture as it seeped into my skin. It was overall refreshing.

One drawback is that you do leave it on 30 minutes, it says 20 to 30, I suggest the full thirty. I tried 20 minutes the first time and 30 the second and saw more results after the thirty minute use.

I also highly recommend using the left over solution that is in the packet after you take the mask off. It feels so good to take that and massage it into your face. Try it, you will not be sorry, I am not saying this because I am a beauty consultant, I would give you an honest review if I liked it or not. For example, I am not crazy about the botanical line, it really doesn’t clean well enough for me. I love the timewise line, it cleans, moisturizes and helps combat fine lines and wrinkles.

It is a little pricey at $70 for 4 of them, however, it is worth it, in my opinion.

You can find it on my website, shameless plug here:

Next up is Goddess Curls, now botanical for my hair is something I can get behind. I am all for fewer chemicals in my hair, especially for my curls. As you know I am always on the lookout for new hair products. I decided to give this a go because I really haven’t found anything I am in love with for defining my curls.

This actually is proving effective, plus it is lightweight, it doesn’t make my hair crunchy or heavy. I have no frizz and no flyaways. I am really loving this product. Once again a swing and a hit out of the ballpark.

I found the product at Target and it is reasonably priced, don’t be intimidated at the product placement if you are of my skin pigmentation. It is in the African American hair care products, if you have curly hair, this is the best section to shop in. Better selection and better products. Curly haired girls unite, it doesn’t matter the skin under the hair, what matters is the hair itself.

The hair gel is reasonably priced at Target:

I hope you all have a great day and let me know if you decide to try the products I review.

You can let me know at or here.

Unconditional Love

I tried to ignore this, I really did, but it hurt too much, physically hurt! I may make some people mad, please don’t be mad at me, well you can be mad, but then get glad in the same pants you got mad in. I just channeled my grandma there.

So, on Facebook, my love/hate relationship continues, someone posted that they wanted unconditional love in 2018. They meant romantic love, not familial love, or friendship love.

Unconditional romantic love doesn’t exist, it is conditional. If one is in a romantic relationship, if one person cheats, lies and is abusive, the other person will fall out of love and leave.

It is not unconditional, I have unconditional love for my children, I will never, ever, leave their sides. I will call them out on any behavior that is not good for them or the ones around them. I have done it before, I am not afraid to do it again.

I have unconditional love for my family, now this does not mean I will put up with abusive behaviors, or lies, I will cut them off, I will still love them, but I will not hesitate to put them out of my life. Especially if I have called you out on said behavior and you continue with it. I still love you, but I don’t want to be around you.

Romantic love is beyond different in all of those instances. If you are in a romantic relationship you open yourself up in a different way, you become more vulnerable, telling that person things you would never tell anyone else. Sharing yourself in a way that two become one, in their very souls. It is rare and unique, and it is conditional. It is conditional upon that other person being worthy of that bond, that trust, if it is broken then the love will die. If one person in the relationship breaks the trust and becomes abusive, emotionally, mentally, physically or verbally; the love will die. Once again, conditional love, I will continue to love you if you treat me a certain way. With respect, love, kindness in all aspects of life.

Once that trust is broken, the love will eventually die, it might take weeks, months and sometimes years, but it will go away.

Romantic unconditional love does not exist, it is not real, there are no knights on horses waiting to swoop us up. There are real men and women, who are flawed beings that can work towards making romantic love work. But it takes work on both sides, it is an every day kind of thing, it is monotonous at times, boring at times, mentally draining at times, but it can be achieved. However, it is not unconditional, it has conditions that have to be met.

Marriage is a contract, once it is signed you promise to love, cherish, be faithful, honor and if you are of a certain faith obey. I am not going to debate the whole obey thing here, if you promise that, it’s your business not mine.

But the rest, it takes hard work after the honeymoon period is over, a lot of people don’t understand that.

So, in essence, stop looking for something you are never going to find, look for real, for honest, for loyalty.

As for me, I am choosing to wait for Dean Cain, I refuse to accept anything less than my superman.

And yes, I do realize this will never happen, I am not an idiot. What this means is I am choosing to be alone, due to the fact that I have yet to meet a man (relatives aside) that can actually fulfill his end of the contract. Faithfulness, loyalty, kindness and loving. If you have this in your life, good for you, you found it, but if you are honest you will admit that it is conditional on them continuing to treat you in this manner.

All comments and complaints welcome, feel free to leave them here or email me at

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