I have a confession to make, yesterday I started thinking. That is not always a good thing with me. I was thinking about my mom and how she would pray for me.

Then I started thinking how I haven’t had anyone in my life that has prayed for me since she left this earth. I became resigned to the idea that no one would ever pray for me again. It made me sad, then I went to sleep.

The next morning, today, I received from two different women in my life this:

God showed me not one but two of my friends were praying for me. God’s timing is always perfect and always on time. Gail and Michelle I want you both to know you two are in my daily prayers!

That’s the way it works, God knows what we need when we need it. Now I know what you are going to say, there are more people than these two ladies that pray for me.

But it was these two that God placed on their hearts the job of reaching out to me and telling me that I was in their prayers.

I take prayer very seriously, if I tell someone I am praying for them then they can take that to the bank.

I’ll confess something else, I very rarely tell God what I need or want in my life. And that is a mistake, we are supposed to take the desires of our heart to Him. I have problems with that, a lesson I’m still learning. Even at my advanced age I still have lessons to learn.

Never take for granted the people in your life that intercede in prayer on your behalf. I know I don’t.

CTJ and Judgements

Ok, so I had a CTJ, for those of you that are not familiar, that is a Come to Jesus meeting. I had that meeting with myself, it wasn’t pretty but it was much needed.

I was perusing Facebook when someone’s post caught my eye. It said how stressed they were with being in isolation with their family.

At first I was judgmental, because they get to be with someone, they have someone to talk to, they are not left alone, they don’t live in a shack. They have entertainments readily available.

Then I stopped, just stopped, what do I know about that persons life. Nothing that they don’t want others to know about on Facebook. I don’t know what their stresses are, so I stopped.

I’m sure others look at me and judge as well, I live in a nice house, plenty of food, my bills are paid and I am still able to work and provide for myself. I am not totally alone, I do have my pets and I am able to see Alex and Elicia.

Every human deals with different things differently, i am not that stressed. I miss Friday night dinners and pedicures. But I’m not stressed out about them being ripped away from me.

I have been thinking about quarantine hair, I really want purple back in my hair. I am thinking purple on the underside. I have red right now, all over, why not have both of my favorite color on my head.

I’ve been watching a lot of Brad Mondo’s videos on Facebook. He’s an amazing hair stylist and he loves color. If I ever go to New York I am going to do my best to get an appointment with him. I’m completely obsessed with watching his videos.

Last night I started watching Mrs America on Hulu. It’s about both sides of the ERA battle in the 1970’s. It’s fascinating, the extremes on both sides.

I’ll leave you with that. I’m tired now and going to sleep. Peace out peeps.

Healthy Fear and Cats

So I thought Ronald, aka Fat Catstard, wasn’t breathing, turns out he was sleeping. Now he’s super mad at me, but at least now he knows how it feels to be woken in the middle of the night. I fear repercussions tonight, if I don’t show up online tomorrow for work I need my coworkers to do a wellness check. Maybe send animal control, I don’t know, but I do know enough to have some healthy fear.

There we have it, healthy fear, what is a proper amount of healthy fear and what is overboard? Only individuals can answer that, for me healthy fear is knowing what is out there and making preparations to make myself as safe as possible.

There are few things I fear in this world, heights, I do fear that particular thing. Here’s the weird thing, I didn’t fear heights in my youth. The higher the swing went the more I loved it, climbing to the highest point on the monkey bars was my go to at recess. I very literally had no fear, of anything, now I am terrified of heights, I hate elevators, escalators, anything that takes me up. Forget ski lifts, those are the worst, I don’t even know if I could go up in one of those gondolas.

I do have another fear, I fear going completely blind and not being able to read anymore. That is my one besides heights, those are both irrational fears, not healthy ones.

I’m watching Star Trek TOS right now, part of me wishes I had waited to be born so I could travel beyond this planet.

Last night I rewatched the Lois and Clark where they put Dean Cain in the black Superman suit. It was a great episode, for many reasons. But in particular, the black Superman outfit, was the absolute best part of that episode.

No shallowness going on here, at all, if I could insert the eye roll emoji here I would do so. A lot of people like to pretend they are not shallow, but we all are in some way. I fully admit to being attracted to “pretty” men, with Dean Cain being the prettiest of all.

Sometimes I wonder if he has made a deal with God the way I have. He is aging amazingly well.

I have to go now, I am on episode 3 of season 1 of TOS and this one requires a lot of my attention.

People are evolving and being able to control things with their minds. I must pay attention.

Happy Anniversary to Me

So a few days ago I had an anniversary. Not a romantic one, that has never been in the cards for me. But a professional one, I marked 23 years with the same company.

I think that is somewhat of a milestone. Not a huge one, but one nonetheless.

I started out as an operations clerk, what is that you ask, good question. It is basically a secretary, it was literally one of my favorite jobs in the phone company. It’s where I learned that I cannot be entrusted with any amount of power. I had the best boss and met a lot of great people. As a matter of fact I am still friends with quite a few of them.

From there I went to be a service rep, upgrade in pay, downgrade in power. But I loved it, once again, great coworkers and I learned a lot. I loved that job so much, I had a lot of fun and learned a lot as well.

But alas all good things must end and that job went up north, way up north. So then I worked in pay phones, writing the orders for them. As you can imagine it was incredibly boring as that was a dying department. Cell phones were becoming more ubiquitous so there wasn’t a huge need for pay phones. Except in prisons and hospitals, so that didn’t last too long.

Next up was a stint in orders, not residential, thank goodness, but writing to orders for T1’s, voice grade and data circuits. Which was ok and I learned a lot.

Then I made a huge decision and moved to a different subsidiary within the company. I made the jump to DSL. Talk about a huge difference in jobs and responsibilities. The first two weeks of training I came home and passed out, I was so mentally exhausted. But I loved it and once again met great people and made lifelong friends. A couple I’m convinced I’m actually related to.

After a while that job ended, the whole department went away. I didn’t know what I was going to do, then the decision was made for me. I was moving to a different department in the company. I could still use my internet training but television and phone was added to my repertoire.

There I made more friends and discovered more family. I really love what I do, I love helping people stay connected. Now more than ever, even when people yell at me. I still have a feeling of satisfaction when I fix someone’s problem.

I’ve often said the job at the phone company saved my family. It enabled me to raise three children to adulthood. It has given us so much, I’ll be forever grateful they took a chance and hired a single mother of three. Here’s to 24 more years.

Graveyards and Jeggings

I am fascinated with old graveyards, today I did something I have wanted to do since I moved to this town. There is an old cemetery by my house, so today, on our walk, Storm and I went there. It is a family plot but all of the headstones are old, from the 1800’s through 1968.

It was sad being there, it is fenced off but it is neglected, overrun by weeds and long grass. I had an incredible urge to clean it up, to let the people who are resting there that they have not been forgotten.

But the sad thing is, they have been forgotten, I don’t know them, I don’t know the family name. If I did I would ask them why they allowed their ancestors resting place to become so forlorn and sad.

It reminded me of one of my favorite paintings by Adolf Hiremy-Hirschi, it is of a graveyard that is abandoned and neglected. Weather worn, with waves crashing into it, long forgotten by loved ones.

I often wonder how many generations it takes to forget loved ones. One, two? Maybe three, if we don’t take the time to make our grandparents and great grandparents and even further back, real to our children and grandchildren, they will be forgotten.

It’s one of the reasons I tell my stories over and over to my children and Tessa. I am hoping they stick and that my memories will not be forgotten and will live on.

I think that is human nature, to want to be remembered, to want the history of ones family to be remembered.

Enough of that, I have to tell you about the best thing I have bought to date. I am so stupidly excited about this find, ok, so you all know I became obsessed with Spanx leggings this past winter. Well, I decided to try the Spanx jeggings, yes, I said it, jeggings. I have been dying to try them but I wanted good quality ones, not cheap ones.

So I saw the Spanx ones on sale, because they are stupidly expensive otherwise, and decided to dive in.

Wow, they are amazing, the fit is fantastic, the fabric is nice and thick, not thin and they hold everything in where it should be held in.

I highly suggest them to anyone wanting to try them, they are true to size so don’t size up or down.

Zulily has the best prices of anywhere I’ve seen, if you decide to get them try that site.

Well that is all I have for now, I’ll post pictures of the graveyard and of my favorite painting.

25 Years Ago

I choose to live in Texas, a great state in and of itself. I am from Oklahoma, a state that is filled with people who are strong, resilient, intelligent, warm, kind and when the chips are down, there.

On this day twenty-five years ago those traits were on full display for not only the country to see but the whole world as well.

To say I am proud of my fellow Oklahomans and the way they responded to the Alfred P. Murrah building being bombed would be an understatement. I don’t know if I have the proper words to express my deep love and admiration I have for my people. I’ll try.

We lost so much that day, many of us lost relatives, mother, fathers, daughters, grandchildren, spouses and cousins. It is inconceivable to think of the evil that existed that caused this to happen.

My heart still breaks for my home state’s loss, the loss of life, the loss of innocence, the loss of peace. No one could have ever even foreseen anything of this nature happening in middle America.

We were not an international hub, not a must see state for other countries. We have a hard history behind us. We are a people of perseverance, the dust bowl and the depression taught our people to be tough.

Under the toughness we have kindness, through our tough times we learned to lean on each other and get through it together.

This time we saw the rest of the country come to our aide, we saw that we were loved and the nation mourned with us.

We overcame, we came out stronger, the way we usually do, but we also came out a little battered.

When you think of my home state today, say a prayer for our heart. And know that we appreciate the rest of our countrymen coming to our aide that day.


I am very literally in Nerdvana right now, please allow me to tell you how my week is going so far and of what is to come.

So on Monday  (or it may have been Sunday, my days are running together) Teri Hatcher announces she will be doing a live Instagram with Dean Cain! I literally did the dance of joy (Joss Whedon fans will get that) then I started panicking, what if I can’t watch! I do have work!

Thankfully it timed perfectly with my final break of the day, I was so happy to be able to tune in, especially since the event I was supposed to see them both at was postponed until June. When I have a wedding to attend, praying this lockdown is over by then. Which meant I would not be able to see them together at all. What a lovely option to have, to see them doing a live feed, together, apart. 

You can feel how genuine their friendship is, the easy banter was delightful and refreshing. It is a great example of how two people who differ politically can maintain a friendship.

I will tell you this during the course of their live conversation, Teri asked Dean how he was able to maintain friendships when politics are so different. Dean said well tell me what policies you disagree with, I bet we are not so different. She grew coy and hemmed and hawed and said well and said a name, Dean said that is not a policy. I asked for a specific policy, she said don’t make me do this. She is the one that started that conversation and this is nothing against Teri, please do not misconstrue this as a criticism.

However, her response is what is systemically wrong with society as a whole. Not just here in the United States, not liking the person who was duly elected is not a policy. If someone can actually tell me a policy they disagree with, then we can have a discussion. But so few people today can actually discuss policy, they want to make it personal and they want to just say well this person or that person. I don’t like them, that is not policy.

I have friends I don’t agree with politically but I can maintain a friendship, I will tell you rarely do they discuss policy. This is on both sides of the fence, it is not directed at one or the other, I have seen it on both sides. Nonetheless I enjoyed their banter and loved their discourse and would love to see them act together in a project, even if it is not Superman.

The next thing my inner Nerd Girl, ok not so inner, is happy about, is Chuck! The cast of Chuck is doing a live table read of one of their scripts on Friday. It is for charity, I will post the link at the bottom, it is to raise money to help feed families across America.

What a great, fun way to raise money for a great cause. I know I am new to the world of Chuck, but I have watched the series in it’s entirety now 5 times. It is just so watchable and fun. The characters are just greatness and the actors who brought them to life were fantastic at it. I look forward to watching them have fun again.

I am having the best Nerd week EVER! I hope you all have a great week and are able to find joy in the every day things that are around you.

If you are able to spare a little I know it would be appreciated. This is a great cause and the money is all going to help feed people in our own communities.

The Snake vs The Dad

The story I am going to tell you today comes from my memories, it is about my mom and dad. I must give you some backstory first. I grew up in the country, outside of Owasso. We had what is called bottom land, it is land that is low-lying land that has water running through it and is very fertile.

Our garden was huge, it was the size of my whole lot that my house sits on. My dad was quite the jokester, that is important as well. He was funny and love joking and playing jokes, good natured ones, not mean spirited ones.

Well one day my mom and dad were taking a walk down to the garden. The path was narrow so my dad was walking in front of my mom.

They were walking in front of the fruit trees getting ready to cross the bridge to the garden.

My mom looks down and spots what she thinks is a rubber snake. She thinks to herself daddio thinks he’s funny, I’ll show him. She picks it up and flings it at him, as it is flying through the air she realizes it is not rubber, it is real!

It hits my dad and falls to the ground stunned, my dad is stunned as well.

The snake actually slithered off, I think it was so stunned it didn’t know what to do, it just wanted to escape the crazy humans!

My poor mother was completely horrified, my dad said why did you do that??

She explains she thought it was a fake snake and he had thrown it first. He laughed so hard, he thought it was hysterical, she thought it was horrifying.

After that, for years, any time they disagreed my dad would say do you remember when you threw the snake at me? He won many arguments for many years on that one.

So my dog is doing something weird, she typically will lay in bed with me until I turn the light off and then go to the floor. Huskies love to sleep on the floor, especially tile or wood.

For the past three nights she has slept on the bed all night. Very strange, I hope she is not conspiring with Fat Catstard, I like my face.

The Cowboy Way

I think the one thing I miss the most with this whole not leaving the house thing is being able to tell stories. Stories about my people, so I made a decision, I am going to tell them here. Today I am going to tell you one about my Great-Grandpa, he was my grandpa and my dad’s dad. I was adopted by my great aunt and uncle, so it gets a little convoluted. The grandparents I talk about are my real grandparents on my birth mothers side. So here goes, a story my dad and grandpa used to tell me about their dad:

He was a cowboy, a real one, that rode the trail between Dodge City and Abilene. During one of those times the crew lost their cook, now this was a big deal, not just anyone could crank out edible meals on the trail. So the foreman decides they are going to take turns, he assigns one man and says the next in line will be the first to complain.

No one complained because no one wanted to be the cook. Well, the old boy (my grandpa and dad’s words) who was doing the cooking got tired of it and decided to create the most inedible meal he could come up with.

He dumped a ton of salt in the beans, that evening they are all sitting around the campfire trying to get this down. One man says this is sure salty, everyone looked at him, he continues, just the way I like it and adds more salt to the beans. The pretend cook was so angry his face turned red, then came dessert, he made a rhubarb pie, with no sugar. I don’t know if any of you have ever had rhubarb, but without sugar it is the most sour thing on earth. They take big bites and as my grandpa related it puckered their whole body. One of the old boys says this is perfect, everyone looks at him, he then walks over to the sugar and says this way we can each make it as sweet as we want.

The cook stomped off spittin’ mad! They hired a new cook at the next town.

I loved that story growing up, I loved that we were part Cowboy. I used to tell my kids that we were part Cowboy like it was a nationality.

That’s my story of the day, I hope everyone is have a great day in quarantine. I went to Costco and Target yesterday, that was an adventure.

People really are not exhibiting common courtesy, in Costco two people cut in line in front of me. One was an older woman, I let that one go, the other was one in roughly mid-thirties. That one I did not let go, I said hey excuse me, she turned around, I said I am literally standing here and you cut in front of me. I was observing the 6 feet rule and she just went in that space.

She then pretended not to speak English, I was flabbergasted, I would have continued but I realized if I did I was going to end up on a youtube video.

But seriously, don’t do this people, this is a really dangerous time to act like jackasses in grocery stores.

Yesterday was Good Friday, a day we take to acknowledge and give thanks that Christ gave up His life on earth so we could have everlasting life in heaven. Tomorrow we celebrate His resurrection, what a strange day it will be. No Easter dresses, no egg hunts, stripped bare of our trappings, we will have no excuses not to focus on the extreme gift God gave to us.

I miss my granddaughter, Good Friday is our day together and we do something fun. Next year we will have to make up for not being together this year.

Check on your friends that are grandparents, we are not ok.

I hope you all have a great Easter weekend, if you are in your home with loved ones, I pray you thank God profusely for that blessing.

Unpopular Opinions Television Edition

Someone on Facebook, I want to say my friend Steve but I may be wrong, posted their unpopular opinion on things he doesn’t watch and a lot of other people do. I was inspired to do my own list. Here goes, things on tv I abhor and the majority of the population loves:

1. The bachelor and bachelorette, these are very literally the worst shows on television today. Please tell me what self respecting woman vies for the attention of a man dating multiple women at the same time, claiming he has to make out with all of them to figure out if he wants to give a ring to one?? And vice versa, just stop, it’s insane and gross. I’m hugely surprised no one has caught a disease yet.

2. Dancing with the stars, I’ve often said I’m so glad Dean Cain has never done this show. It would force me to watch it. Although I never saw the dating one he did. I’m still mad about that one, not that he did it, that I wasn’t a contestant.

4. The masked singer, American idol and the voice.

5. All sports on tv. Especially soccer. So boring. I do enjoy football, basketball, baseball and hockey in person. Never on television. Not even soccer in person. Paint drying is way more compelling than soccer.

6. WWE, I do love Dwayne Johnson, but not wrestling.

That’s it, my unpopular opinions on television shows that everyone seems to love.

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