What I am about to say might make more than a few people unhappy with me. That’s pretty normal though, I have a knack for doing that. It is very controversial in today’s Christian community, what I am about to say, so read at your own risk.
Whenever someone dies I have seen and heard people saying oh so and so is now looking over you from heaven. Or, the ever popular, they are an angel now.
I don’t believe either, as a matter of fact the Bible dispels that quite handily.
Take for example: “And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away” (Revelation 21:4).
What that says to me is that everyone who is in Heaven is at perfect peace, no more tears, no more sorrow. If they are looking down at what is going on here, on earth, is that a peaceful existence? I think not, I for one, believe that if my mother saw how much I still grieve for her she would be saddened. Therefore not at perfect peace, there would be sorrow in her heart that I am sad.
Or, if my dad could see what the last couple of years of my life had been like, he would have been angry with me for putting up with so many things. Once again, not at perfect peace, his heart would be in pain for what I allowed to happen and how I was treated.
I don’t want to think that when we die that we will still know what is going on here on earth. I want to think of my mother walking down that street of gold, whistling her little heart out. When she was happy, she whistled, so I know she is whistling in heaven.
I want to think of my grandpa working on a car, or doing biblical research all day long. That is what made him happy.
My grandmother happily watching The Days of Our Lives and eating candy.
I don’t want them to have sorrow and tears in Heaven.
The Bible tells us other things as well: “The wolf and the lamb shall feed together, the lion shall eat straw like the ox, and dust [shall be] the serpent’s food. They shall not hurt nor destroy in all My holy mountain,” says the LORD (Isaiah 65:25).
What that says to me is that animals will be there, none will be harmful, poisonous or predatory. I’ll finally be able to pet a lion and I will be quite joyous.
We also do not turn into Angels, Angels are God’s creation, separate from man. God created man to have freewill and come to Him willingly, joyfully. Angels were created to do God’s bidding, to obey Him without condition or freewill.
When I die, I will not be watching what is happening on earth, I will be incredibly busy catching up with my mom, dad, grandma, grandpa, great aunt Effie and my son, Michael. I will also be seeing a host of aunts, uncles, cousins and now my brother Jesse.
I look forward to it, I am not afraid to die, I don’t want to die, well, ever, but I have no fear of it.
I will be petting lions, seeing Nocona and rejoicing at the throne of God.
If you don’t agree with me, well, that is your freewill, I for one, do not want to think that my dead loved ones are watching my every move. I want to know I am truly alone when I am in certain places and doing certain things.
As usual, any comments or disagreements can be issued here or sent to me at angie@angieworld.com
Fears
Since Halloween is I thought I would take a moment and share what really scares me, no it is not goblins, ghosts or anything else that goes bump in the night. Those things would be a welcome change to the reality of my life. No what really and truly scares me the most is losing my hair. I don’t want to be a bald wrinkled woman. I know that is considered to be vain and vapid by most, but truly, the most horrible things that could happen to me have already happened.
This month marked the first anniversary of one of my best friends death and also the 27th anniversary of my sons death. Some years are worse than others, this year has been bad, probably due to outside influences, but I miss Michael so much this year. Not being able to go and put flowers on his grave has been particularly hard on me.
I don’t fear death, I don’t fear dying alone, like so many people do, I have always known that I would die alone, I have spent the majority of my life alone, I have always known the end of my life would be no different. Really when you think about it, dying alone is preferable, when you die your body does strange things. Better for that to happen where no one can witness it, that way it wont be their last memory of you.
Michael, I love you, I miss you so much, there has never been a day that you have not been in my thoughts and in my heart.I wonder which one of your siblings you would be the most like. I wonder what you would have looked like at all of their ages, I wonder what it would have been like raising all of you, together. I know that your grandparents and great grandparents are with you and looking out for you until I can do that again. Love, Mom
Making Money
Today is our first food sale to raise funds for United Way, I am very excited to be jumping back onto the merry-go-round. United Way helps so many people in so many areas. I am honored to help in any small way I can to help they reach their financial goals. You too can help, by buying jerseys, raffle tickets or food from us or anyone that you know is raising funds for this worthwhile cause.
The meat is heating, the cheese is heating and I am getting dressed to go out and raise some money! What a great Friday indeed.
As I reflect on all of the things that have happened since I was last doing this activity, I am amazed I can stand. It is almost the one year anniversary of losing Sandi, then our beloved pet Arthur passed, then losing Dee, then some other things I refuse to talk about here, a very rough year indeed. However what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger, right? We shall see, I am moving forward, trying not to look back too much as I cannot change anything, all I can do is learn from it and hopefully not be doomed to repeat certain mistakes.
Angie World 