I just read an article on Yahoo! Shine regarding a bikini for large women, it is dubbed the fatkini, by the designer, not me. There is a picture there of a large size model wearing the suit.
Now I am nowhere near a size 20, however the model looks to be, she is pretty, but significantly large. I went to the bottom of the page to look at the comments, almost all comments were from men. They were not kind, in fact they were brutal, it makes me not want to don a swimsuit at all. Once again I am nowhere near the size of the woman in the photo, nor am I as pretty in the face as the woman in the photo.
This makes me seriously wonder what men think of me when they see me, do they see the frumpy woman that has given birth five times, 4 c-sections, and say what a disgusting lump of a woman. This is seriously disheartening, the hatred and vitriol for women in this world.
We work hard, we have children, and yes, we gain weight and our bodies are less than they were at 16. The comments at the end of the article suggest that all women should look exactly the way they did before childbirth. Now I m not saying that you should let yourself go and just get as big as a house. No, we need to be healthy today, to live to see our grandchildren and great grandchildren, we need to leave the confines of the house and take a walk. We need to watch what we eat, say no to the junk food all the time, a treat once in a while wont effect us if it is not an every moment activity.
However having such hatred for the different body types of women has reached an epidemic, has it always been this way, or are we now seeing it more with the advent of social media?
I don’t have an answer to that, I myself, have always considered myself a looker, I did go through a heavy phase, I have battled and continue to battle that war. I feel at times I am winning; at times I am losing, however I continue to battle. I want to live to see Tessa grow up and do great things. I want to live to see Elizabeth Anne have children and I want to be around to spoil them. I want to live to see Alex graduate college and do amazing things with his life. So I battle on, however, I am now greatly aware of how men see me.
As a lump, a disgusting whale that should be harpooned, I am sad and want to hide in a tent.
Whale or Mermaid
What I am about to say is going to offend people, and well frankly, I don’t care. There is a picture of a plus size model who is naked going around on Facebook and other networking sites with the story of a woman who goes on and on about wanting to be a whale instead of a mermaid. Well, I don’t want to see that fat naked woman, yes, I said it, fat and naked. I can see that when I look in the mirror, that is why I choose not to look in the mirror when I have no clothes on. I don’t want to be a whale, nor do I want to be a mermaid. What I would like to be is a fit, healthy woman, who fits comfortably in a size 4. I don’t care how hated that makes me, I don’t care that I offend people. I am not going to embrace being fat, it is not healthy to have fat surrounding your heart, lungs, kidneys or other organs in your body. To call yourself curvy, a real woman (yes I am sick of that one, simply because I am not a size 16 does not make me unreal) or whatever euphemism is out there does not make you healthy. I battle with weight constantly and have since I hit puberty, I have friends who battle it, however I do not see them embracing being unhealthy, they are all concerned about their health. I do something to battle my weight issues, I am currently incorporating the Weight Watcher lifestyle into my eating habits. It works, I have said it before and I will say it again, if you have issues of that nature, there is an app for that. There are even free ones, MyFitnessPal is a good one.
I really don’t care to see the whale story anymore, nor do I want to see the fat naked plus sized model again. I am not a whale, I am not a mermaid, I am simply a woman trying to live a long, healthy life, the way my grandmother did. I want to see my grandchildren, great-grandchildren, and many greats after that.
Angie World 