Too Old for My Dreams

So my bestie starts telling me about this show she is watching on Hulu. There’s something you have to understand about my bestie, she never gets the names of show right. So I have to guess at what she is trying to tell me. I ask her who is in it, she never knows the names of the actors.

It’s always fun trying to figure what she is talking about, I am convinced this is what will stave off Alzheimer’s. The brain teasers trying to figure these things out.

So she says it has the guy from Charmed, the original, I think for a minute, put all of the pieces together and blurt our Brothers and Sisters. She says yea that’s it. I tell her I watched the series when it was originally on.

But then it happened, I had to go back and watch it from the beginning. I loved this show when it first aired. I identified with Sarah, single mom, husband walked out on her. The only difference was I didn’t have a hot French guy come sweep me off of my feet.

I really wanted to be the Kitty character, not the getting sick part, but the political pundit part. I would have loved that.

As I have grown older and I am watching again at first I thought I identified with Nora. But now I realize I am Saul. He said something so profound and I thought oh that’s me.

Nora went to Sauls office and was inserting herself in his work. He became very upset and yelled and end scene. The next scene is him telling Nora that work is all he has. “My dreams are all gone, I’m too old for them.”

That’s me, I’m too old for my dreams. I had so many, I wanted to be a writer. I wanted to travel the world. I really wanted to go to Egypt. That place on earth has always fascinated me. I don’t know if the region will stabilize enough for me to explore it before I leave this plane of existence. So too old for my dreams.

I always thought I would have someone to share my life with, but that was not to be the case. I’m too old for my dreams.

But the best dream I ever dared dream happened. When I was five years old I knew I wanted to be a mom. That dream has been the best experience of my life. God gave me three of the most amazing children on earth.

Now being a Gigi, that’s just icing, I am blown away at how amazing the reality of that is. So many dreams I am too old for, but being a mom and a Gigi, well I’m just right for that dream.

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