Happy Birthday Michael

I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again, and I’ll say it in the future, the beginning of August is hard. The end of August is incredible.

Today, August 9, is my son Michael’s birthday, I still remember every moment of that day.

I was past due and the doctor decided to induce labor. At one point the pain was so intense and it was not a labor pain it was in my hips, it felt like he was sideways pushing outward. I told the doctor this and he said oh yeah if you get up and walk that pain will go away. I said great let’s do it, he said no you’re doing fine. I said what, he reiterated he did not want me to walk, I said fine, get me some Demerol, he said no, it was at this point my inner sailor came out. 

I grabbed him by the tie and pulled him close and said if you do not get me some **&&^% pain killer you will not see one *&^%$%^&**&^%%% red cent. I then let go of his tie with a flourish and he angrily walked out of the door.

My husband at the time, Michael (and all of my children’s) father looked at me and said I didn’t even know you knew those words. I then turned my glare to him and he backed away slowly.

It was then the nurse walked in laughing with a needle and said honey I don’t know what you said to him but he is red faced and mad. I looked at her and said give me the meds.

Later, after intense labor, Michael’s heart rate dropped drastically and it was decided an emergency c-section was needed.

The cord was wrapped around his neck twice, he would not have survived a natural birth.

But he was there and crying and huge! He weighed in at 8 pounds and 10 1/2 ounces.

He was beautiful and perfect and my world was complete.

It was short lived, a mere 12 weeks later he was gone, SIDS, I don’t want to relive that day, it comes soon enough.

While he was here he brought so much joy, this birthday is particularly poignant, you see Michael has been reunited with the one he was named after. Michael Marino Barsi, he is now with his grandpa Reno, I find comfort in that. 

Reno loved that little boy so much, he was his first grandson, that in itself made him special. They had a bond from the beginning, Reno could make Michael belly laugh at a young age I know he grieved Michael as much as we did.

I know that this heavenly birthday will be special, it will be a first with his grandpa Reno, perhaps my mom will bake her famous coconut cake. My dad, mom, brothers and Grandpa Reno will sing happy birthday. I can actually picture it and it is soothing.

Happy Birthday Michael, mommy misses you so much, every single day. I love you and know I will see you again one day.