Tag: life

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Happy Birthday Michael Marino

August 9th, 1984, one of the happiest days of my life, a baby boy arrived. Michael Marino Barsi, my little M&M, he was perfect.

Who knew we would only get 12 weeks with him. If I had known would I have done things differently? Yes, I would not have gone back to work, I would have spent every moment I had with him. I would never have allowed him out of my sight for a second.

I still remember the day he was born, I was in labor for hours before his heart rate dropped exponentially. The doctor said we have to get him out now, and I was rushed to an operating room. The umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck twice, he would have died in the birth canal. But he was there, 8 pounds and 10 and a half ounces. A beautiful baby boy, that was loved beyond measure.

It’s been 46 years and sometimes my arms still ache to hold him. I often wonder what he would be like as an adult, what the other children would be like if they had their oldest brother with them. 

Of course it is an answer I will never have, I have to take comfort in the fact that he is in heaven. I believe that with my whole heart. I will see him again, will he be a baby or an adult, I don’t know. I just know I will recognize him when I see him.

I have reminders of him in my every day life, I actually have a plant that someone gave us for his funeral. This plant is 42 years old, it is still thriving, in fact I do cuttings from it and make new plants and give them to family members. So they have part of Michael with them as well.

That is the plant, it is still healthy and living, somehow it gives me comfort. 

I am also comforted by the fact that he has family members with him. His grandparents on my side and his grandpa Reno and granny Dee on his dad’s side of the family. My brothers are up there as well, along with my favorite cousin Cindy. 

I’ll love you forever Michael, I don’t know why you had to go, and I’ll never know until I am with you again. Just know that you were loved while you were here and loved for an eternity after you left. 

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Happy Anniversary Foy and Odela

Today is the day, the day that started everything in our family. The day that Foy John Testerman took Odela Mae Allen as his lawfully wedded wife. The day she took him as her lawfully wedded husband.

Did they wait until they were financially stable to get married? No. It was during one of this nations worst financial crisis it had ever seen. The Great Depression was going on, there was no money, Oklahoma was officially a dust bowl. Red dust everywhere, but in Love County Oklahoma there was magic.

A tale as old as time, a pure, old fashioned love story was unfolding, one that had been 15 years in the making. You see Odela had been in love with Foy since she was 5 years old and he was 7 years old. It just took him a little bit longer to come to his senses.

He had to travel to California and back to realize the best thing ever has been right in his own backyard all along. They started a family, first Jimmy then Nell (Linnie Nell, officially) then Jesse. Then many years later, after their own children were grown and they had grandchildren they took on the last child, Angie. That’s me.

Their love knew no bounds, they gave freely to their children, grand-children and great grandchildren. Their neighbors, friends and church family would also expeirence their generosity of spirit.

I often think back to that house 5 miles outside of Owasso, Oklahoma, where I learned what family really meant. I wish I could go back for just a few hours and sit with them and tell them what they did for me has carried on, their legacy can be seen with all of us.

From their oldest grandson, the first, who willingly gave to this country by joining the Air Force, serving with honor. I hope he knows how proud of him his grandparents were.

I wish I could tell them about my children and how they turned out as adults, I know my dad would have loved to have seen his granddaughter carry on the Testerman legacy of taming wild beasts. I know he would love to have seen my boys grow up to own their own businesses and become fathers themselves.

He would have been thrilled to see twins in the family again, since he, himself, was a twin. Oh how he and mom would have laughed at the antics of those girls, the Agents of Chaos.

I know they have met their sons at the gates of heaven, celebrated eternal life with them, and are waiting for us all to join them one day.

I wish I could go back and tell them how much I have loved being adopted by them, how much I love my sister, Nell, their only daughter until I showed up.

I wish I could tell them how grateful I am to this day that they got married, persevered, raised their family then had so much love left over they included me in their circle.

I wish I could tell the world how much of their life was dedicated to Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior. How they lived every single day as an example of how Christianity should look.

Happy Anniversary Foy and Odela I hope you are celebrating in Heaven and that you have coconut cake!

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History

I think about the afterlife a lot, I seem to be surrounded by death, I grew up going to funerals. Uncles, Aunts, Great-Uncles and Great-Aunts, my Grandfather. Then later my son, grandmother and parents. I wish that death would take a break with me, losing Sandi last year was unbelievably hard, there are times I can actually hear her voice. Angela, that is what she would call me most of the time, she would say it with a certain tone. I can’t even explain it, just know there are times I can hear her say my name as clear as day.
I still miss her so much, I could use someone to tell me what to do right about now, I find myself in a situation where I am unable to make decisions like I should. I hate that, I have never been that way.
For those of you who may be new readers, I shall give you an abreviated story of me:
I was married young, we had four children, one of whom passed away, and then 10 years later he decided he liked blonds better than brunettes. So off he went, I raised my 3 children, I went to college for two years, worked 2 jobs, then got the job with a major telecommunications corporation.
I spent all of my time with my children, running them here and there, on the weekends they were with their dad, well there were still baseball games, dance recitals, soccer games and of course later FFA type things. There was never time for anything else, I honestly don’t know how single mothers find the time to meet men. Anyway, 14 years later, I met someone and we started dating, we have been together 3 years and 8 months. So if you can do the math, more power to you. We did break up once, well, I broke up with him, for one week, maybe it was a week and a half. We are engaged now, since December 2009, we began dating in December 2007.
there is an abrievated story of my adult life.

oh and my children, they are amazing, all of them!