On social media we see a lot of #couplegoals #relationshipgoals #squadgoals and on and on, but what about parenting goals? If it is out there I have yet to see it, so I will tell you mine. Even though my children are grown, I still have parenting goals, I believe parents have them until the day they die. Which will not be for a very long time for me.
I talk to people all day every day and I have friends and people I went to school with and people I have known in life and the saddest thing I hear is “my kids won’t have anything to do with me”.
I don’t know how to respond to that sentence, my children became my world the moment I learned of their existence and they continue to be in my thoughts and prayers on a daily basis. We talk and text and see each other often, I moved to a different city to be closer to them as adults. I literally cannot imagine a world where they don’t speak to me or have anything to do with me.
Maybe a lot of it comes from being a single parent, we are all close, maybe it comes from me being that nosey parent, I just can’t let go. This does not mean I don’t live my life and do the things I want to do, quite the opposite.
I do all of the things I want to do for me and I still have plenty of time to invade my children’s privacy, I mean talk to them and see them.
Have we had differences over the years? Absolutely, there comes a time when daughters try and break free of their mothers because they want to be the rulers in their world. There comes the teenage rebellions, the I know everything and you know nothing stages, but through it all, I never allowed them to put a lot of distance between us. I believe I gave them just enough space to find themselves and be who they are supposed to be, yet enough closeness to let them know I would always be there and be their safety net along the way.
It very literally breaks my heart when people tell me they don’t talk to their adult children. I had a customer call in, who was incredibly angry that the channel she normally watches (Hallmark Murders and Mystery) was not showing Matlock, instead they had Christmas movies on. She said do you know how this makes me feel to see happy people? I had no words, I had to explain that we could only show what the network gives us. She said well I have nothing then, my kids don’t talk to me, I have no friends all I have is Matlock. I honestly didn’t know what to say to all of that.
For all of my love of television and movies and yes Dean, Lois and Clark, Chuck, anything with Star in the title (Star Trek(first love) Star Wars, Stargate (all of them) Battlestar Galactica and on and on, if I didn’t have my children my life really would be meaningless.
So my parenting goal is for my adult children to always know I’ll be here, no matter what, no matter where their lives take them, no matter the people in them, no matter what decisions they make along the way, I’ll be there.
As usual any comments, questions or criticisms can be left here, any hate or vitriol will be deleted as it is my world, or you can email me at firstname.lastname@example.org