Healthy Fear and Cats

So I thought Ronald, aka Fat Catstard, wasn’t breathing, turns out he was sleeping. Now he’s super mad at me, but at least now he knows how it feels to be woken in the middle of the night. I fear repercussions tonight, if I don’t show up online tomorrow for work I need my coworkers to do a wellness check. Maybe send animal control, I don’t know, but I do know enough to have some healthy fear.

There we have it, healthy fear, what is a proper amount of healthy fear and what is overboard? Only individuals can answer that, for me healthy fear is knowing what is out there and making preparations to make myself as safe as possible.

There are few things I fear in this world, heights, I do fear that particular thing. Here’s the weird thing, I didn’t fear heights in my youth. The higher the swing went the more I loved it, climbing to the highest point on the monkey bars was my go to at recess. I very literally had no fear, of anything, now I am terrified of heights, I hate elevators, escalators, anything that takes me up. Forget ski lifts, those are the worst, I don’t even know if I could go up in one of those gondolas.

I do have another fear, I fear going completely blind and not being able to read anymore. That is my one besides heights, those are both irrational fears, not healthy ones.

I’m watching Star Trek TOS right now, part of me wishes I had waited to be born so I could travel beyond this planet.

Last night I rewatched the Lois and Clark where they put Dean Cain in the black Superman suit. It was a great episode, for many reasons. But in particular, the black Superman outfit, was the absolute best part of that episode.

No shallowness going on here, at all, if I could insert the eye roll emoji here I would do so. A lot of people like to pretend they are not shallow, but we all are in some way. I fully admit to being attracted to “pretty” men, with Dean Cain being the prettiest of all.

Sometimes I wonder if he has made a deal with God the way I have. He is aging amazingly well.

I have to go now, I am on episode 3 of season 1 of TOS and this one requires a lot of my attention.

People are evolving and being able to control things with their minds. I must pay attention.

Let the Fun Begin

So, yesterday, I did something I have not done in years, as a matter of fact I cannot remember the last time I had to do this particular thing. I went to a laundromat, I had to even google where to find one.

My washing machine broke about a month ago, I have been trying to have it fixed since then. The part is finally in and the repairman will be here next week to fix it.

In the meantime I ran out of clothes and towels, here is the thing, I have a lot of clothes and towels. I have so many clothes I didn’t have to do laundry all of this time. However, yesterday was a desperation day, I had to do laundry or go buy new clothes.

I decided to go to a laundromat instead of bothering one of my children because I could wash everything at once and bring it home to dry. I probably should have dried the towels there, so many towels. I was down to my beach towels, so that will tell you something.

Anyway, I found a place in McKinney so I loaded up the car and headed out. The establishment actually had an attendant who was very sweet to me and helped me find the right machines and figure out how many quarters I needed to complete the task. It was a lot of quarters, just FYI, and I washed my things. I didn’t take everything that needed to be washed, I took a lot, but I didn’t take the sheets and the whites. I like to bleach my whites and I have a particular way of doing it, where it takes three cycles to get it done.

Once again my closet and dresser drawers are full and I am relieved. I can wait till Wednesday to do the sheets and whites.

It is officially my birthday month, this year is going to be a great birthday month! Last year was very literally the worst birthday I have ever had, this year is going to be the best. I already have plans with great people the evening before and the day of is with some of the best women I know. I am so excited to usher in this new year of being on this earth. I know it is going to be one of my best years, in terms of me being just me. I really do love who I am, I know, huge surprise for everyone.

But if you can’t love yourself for who you are, then how can anyone else love who you are? I am a really incredible person, I’ve lived through some things during my time on this planet and I have wisdom to impart. Maybe not wisdom, humor, I have humor to impart. Knowledge, I have that as well, maybe some wisdom thrown in for good measure. Yeah, let’s go with that.

Anyway, today is going to be great, family dinner to celebrate Elizabeth Anne’s birthday. Picking up Tessa, I missed her the last time due to the flu, it has been way too long since I have seen her. We have planning to do for our week of fun in July. Never too early to plan.

I feel the need to mention I spent last Saturday evening with Dean Cain. Never mind that he was on my television screen and I was three dimensional in my living room. It counts as a date, right?

I have to go now, I have things to do, peace out peeps. As usual, any comments, criticisms or praise can be left here or sent to angie@angieworld.com.

Go Owasso Rams, Take State!

I know I promised a review of Bitchie Belles, however I was sidetracked by Janet Evanovich’s latest offering. I haven’t laughed so hard reading a book since her last one.

Recently, several people, accused me of romanticizing Owasso, I plead guilty. Oh and this accusation will not change my romanticizing in the least. Just a public service announcement. Why is this important you ask yourself? well, let me tell you, my beloved Owasso Rams are in the State playoffs tonight, against Union.

I know, I don’t watch sports, but I do cheer for my teams, Owasso Rams, OU Sooners, OKC Thunder, I believe you get the point. I am a true hometown girl, no, homestate girl. I love my home state and will cheer for them all, I really hope the Rams win. Since yesterday was my Friday and it is Red day at work, I wore one of my Rams shirts. Today I will wear the other one. Showing support in this way is the very least I can do.

Let’s get back to the romanticizing of a town I haven’t lived in since 1987. Why do I do it, you might wonder, or not, I’m still going to tell you.

I do it because it was the place I finally had real parents, a mom and a dad who taught me so much. Who gave that unconditional parental love, which I had never had, yes, I had my grandparents, my great-aunt Effie and my many cousins and a host of aunts and uncles, but that does not replace that parental love.

I found a best friend that is literally my best friend for life, she and I are more like sisters than any bond I can imagine. Through thick and thin, miles apart and yes sometimes years without contact. The internet is an awesome thing and allows us to keep in contact way more. Through it all, that friendship remains intact, Owasso gave me that, something I cannot discount.

Owasso is the place I truly learned about God’s grace and forgiveness, I learned to be myself, my whole nerdy, geeky self.

I wouldn’t be the person I am without Owasso in my life, I shall romanticize that until the day I leave this earth. Then I will tell God all about it, He might be bored, because He already knows. The whole omniscient thing, He has that.

I can credit Owasso for me being the way I am, so if any of you have a problem with me, call the city of Owasso and tell them.

In other news, Christmas decorating is in full effect in this home, I am so excited, I have me and my fake boyfriend on the tree. If you follow me on Instagram or FB you can see us, together, hanging out, on the Christmas tree. We make such a cute couple, me as a snowperson, him in his Superman costume. So cute.

As usual, if you have any comments, feel free to leave it here or send it to me at angie@angieworld.com.

Dead Neighbors

So I thought my neighbors were dead, turns out they’re not, but I did think they were for a few days. There had been zero movement from their house, even leaving their trash can at the curb for 5 days. A definite no-no according to the HOA, however, I saw them today and they are not dead. Major relief, no one wants to live next door to dead people.
I don’t know them, I have seen them a few times, the kids have said hello to me, the mother gave me a dirty look and I have only seen the dad from afar. Not sure why the dirty look, unless it is because I am a single female living alone. She need not worry, her husband is not my type, being that he is married. Married is not my type, period. It never has been and never will be, so no married ladies need worry that I am looking at their husband thinking I got to get me some of that.
I have been doing a lot of meal prep, as I have said on here, I usually do the same meal for all 5 work days. Today I did something different, 3 different meals for five days. It was a lot more work, time-consuming, however I think the payoff will be worth it.
The cleanse is going well, one of the pills made my tongue numb, but that part of it is done. So no more numb tongue for me.
I miss coffee so much, I got a shipment of Black Riffle Coffee yesterday and I actually hugged the bag and drew in a deep breath. Through my nose, so I could smell the goodness within.
I look forward to drinking it, on September 19th, I shall come home from work and make a huge pot of coffee and drink it all. In one sitting. I will be euphoric, caffeine high, mountain momma. Oh wait, that’s part of a song, I am delirious in my deprivation.
The cleanse is working though, my heartburn is completely gone, it dissipated with my move, now it is totally gone. Also my belly bloat is gone, in the past, no matter what I gave up, it was always there. Now, gone, as of Tuesday, I noticed no more belly pain. I credit this with the cleanse, clean eating, fascia blaster and the belly ball.
I am exhausted from all of that, but happy with the results, weight is leaving me, due to all of that and the working out.
All of this clean living leaves me wondering when I will get to be bad again. I seriously need to get into trouble, not get arrested trouble, just fun trouble. Oh maybe in Owasso, in October, I’ll find it there.
I will still be traveling with my coffeemaker, nothing weird about that.
Does anyone else do that? Travel with their coffeemaker? No? Just me? Coffeemaker and Black Riffle coffee, let’s not forget that, I am a coffee snob and I like it.
Well, that’s all I have for today, my neighbors are not dead and I still can’t have coffee.
Any probes into my sanity can be sent to angie@angieworld.com

Age Rant

As you know by now, I am a big fan of Kellie Raspberry of the Kidd Kraddick in the Morning Show. I also listen to her and her husband, Allen Evans, podcast, A Sandwich and Some Lovin’.
The other night they did a Facebook live recording for their new episode. They happened to have a love expert on, a real life matchmaker. I was interested in what she had to say regarding women my age, I knew it would come up, Kellie has a large fan base with women my age range.
Sure enough the question came up, where do women who are over 50 go to meet men to date.
I wish you all could have seen the look on this woman’s face, I don’t even remember her name, she was horrified that women over 50 would even want to date.
The hesitation in her voice, the look of horror, the though process that clearly showed on her face. Finally she said well it’s very competitive and honestly there isn’t anything until you hit about 55 then men that age want to date in their age range.
The look on Kellie’s face was thank God I got engaged right before I turned 50.
Apparently my first instinct was correct, I will never date again, this time it isn’t my choice. It is because I am past my expiration date. I can only hope that this woman will be happy when she is past hers, alone with her cat, thinking I wonder why I told women who are over 50 they are too old to date.
I’m gonna tell you something, I am just a little bit angry by some of the things she had to say to all of us old gals.
She said never leave your house without looking your best, like I seriously go out in pajamas, house slippers and curlers in my hair. I always look presentable. Oh and another thing, have a really great photo on your social media, don’t post anything of you walking your dog at 5am looking a mess. Well, first of all who does that past the age of 25, B.) women of a certain age don’t really like walking their dog at 5am and I thought we were all supposed to have cats!
Oh and she said go to church, she didn’t say to meet men, she probably meant go to church and pray some man finds you attractive.
I’m done, done, I will not be dating, I will not be a walking glamour shot hoping some man will take notice of me. Unless I thought that would get me Dean Cain, I’m not doing it.
Oh and she said lose weight, then Kellie kinda called her out and said some men like women who are bigger. Then she said oh yeah I guess. What and ever!
Yes, I work out and am seriously caffeine and sugar deprived right now, which is probably why I am ranting more than I usually would about this. However to tell women who are over 50 they are just out of luck. She was simply horrified a woman that old would have the nerve to want to find someone to spend the rest of their miserably old life with.
A huge part of me hopes she finds herself alone at 50, sitting in her house with her cat wondering why can’t I find a man.
I am gonna tell you what, if I wanted to find a man, other than Dean Cain, I could find one. I am Angie, I am the empress, I am in control of where I want my life to go, even if I am older than the hills.
I seriously can’t wait till this thirty days are up.
Any questions or concerns for my sanity can be sent to angie@angieworld.com

Jeffrey Andrew

Today is a day that will live in infamy. Well, at least in our family. Today is the day that my beautiful, oldest son Jeffrey was born. In 1985. 1985. It seems like just a moment ago you were holding my hand and thinking I had all the answers to the universe.

You were always curious, energetic and had great introspective.

My favorite memory of your toddlerhood is when you three years old, we were driving past a fire station. You told me that you wanted to grow up to be the person that fixes the fire trucks. I asked why that job. Most little boys wanted to be a fireman. You said “mommy, someone has to make sure the firemen gets to the fire.”

That sentence sums up who you were and who you continue to be. The caretaker. I love you so much son, your strength, your character and your ability to make sure the firemen get to the fire.

I thank God every single day that I get to be your mom. I also thank Him every day that you allow me to be a part of your daughter’s life.

On this day, the day that you were born, I celebrate the privilege of being chosen to be your mom.

I love you son.

Run Away!

There is an episode of Gilmore Girls where Lorelai laments that the Lorelai look is over. I so totally commiserate with this, the Angie look is over. I literally cannot find clothes I love anymore.
I love a good boot cut jean that sits a little low in the waist, not super low, just below the belly button. Shirts fitted, always fitted, I am not into loose, I never have been. No matter my size, I might add.
With the rise in skinny jean popularity Angie style has gone the way of the dinosaur. I hate skinny jeans, just FYI, I feel like I am an encased sausage. I love a good flare with super high heels. I actually look like I have long legs, I look good! I have a ton of shoes to go with that look.
Now, I do like a good pair of jeans tucked into boots in the winter as well, only a skinny jean can pull that look off. Otherwise the ankles on the boots look like you have cankles. Not a good look people!
If anyone finds any Angie jeans please let me know, do a friend a favor. A fashion favor, as it were.

Today was a great day, I am going to start a cleanse, using essential oils and minerals. I will also be going back to the 3 in 30, you know, absolutely no grains, no dairy and no processed sugar. All for thirty days, also no eating out, as it is just too hard to do while on this. I will begin on Sunday and will report back.
Fair warning to all of my friend and family, the first week I will not be pleasant. I will be grouchy and snarly, I will bite if provoked.
The end result will be me looking amazing for my high school reunion, our 35th high school reunion, I might add.
I seriously can’t wait to see everyone and just have a good time.
Oh, speaking of, Elizabeth Anne is making fun of me for saying that I traveled with my coffee maker. I see nothing wrong with this, I love my coffee and love my coffee maker, I have whole coffee beans and my coffeemaker grinds them before making the coffee. It is fresh and amazing, every single time. Why would I leave that at home? It is one of the loves of my life, for my cleanse, though, I have to give it up. No coffee for thirty days, I don’t even comprehend what I have agreed to.
No coffee, I know I only drink coffee on my days off now, but that is literally 24 cups of coffee a week I am giving up. I can’t even do the math, it is too incomprehensible. Maybe I should live in a cave for a few weeks, not be around humans, humans might appreciate that.
I give up sugar all the time, then I fall off the wagon, what makes this different is I can have dark chocolate and local honey.
I can do this, I have to do this, my looks depend on it.
As usual any comments can be left here or sent to me at angie@angieworld.com

Heaven

What I am about to say might make more than a few people unhappy with me. That’s pretty normal though, I have a knack for doing that. It is very controversial in today’s Christian community, what I am about to say, so read at your own risk.
Whenever someone dies I have seen and heard people saying oh so and so is now looking over you from heaven. Or, the ever popular, they are an angel now.
I don’t believe either, as a matter of fact the Bible dispels that quite handily.
Take for example: “And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away” (Revelation 21:4).
What that says to me is that everyone who is in Heaven is at perfect peace, no more tears, no more sorrow. If they are looking down at what is going on here, on earth, is that a peaceful existence? I think not, I for one, believe that if my mother saw how much I still grieve for her she would be saddened. Therefore not at perfect peace, there would be sorrow in her heart that I am sad.
Or, if my dad could see what the last couple of years of my life had been like, he would have been angry with me for putting up with so many things. Once again, not at perfect peace, his heart would be in pain for what I allowed to happen and how I was treated.
I don’t want to think that when we die that we will still know what is going on here on earth. I want to think of my mother walking down that street of gold, whistling her little heart out. When she was happy, she whistled, so I know she is whistling in heaven.
I want to think of my grandpa working on a car, or doing biblical research all day long. That is what made him happy.
My grandmother happily watching The Days of Our Lives and eating candy.
I don’t want them to have sorrow and tears in Heaven.
The Bible tells us other things as well: “The wolf and the lamb shall feed together, the lion shall eat straw like the ox, and dust [shall be] the serpent’s food. They shall not hurt nor destroy in all My holy mountain,” says the LORD (Isaiah 65:25).
What that says to me is that animals will be there, none will be harmful, poisonous or predatory. I’ll finally be able to pet a lion and I will be quite joyous.
We also do not turn into Angels, Angels are God’s creation, separate from man. God created man to have freewill and come to Him willingly, joyfully. Angels were created to do God’s bidding, to obey Him without condition or freewill.
When I die, I will not be watching what is happening on earth, I will be incredibly busy catching up with my mom, dad, grandma, grandpa, great aunt Effie and my son, Michael. I will also be seeing a host of aunts, uncles, cousins and now my brother Jesse.
I look forward to it, I am not afraid to die, I don’t want to die, well, ever, but I have no fear of it.
I will be petting lions, seeing Nocona and rejoicing at the throne of God.
If you don’t agree with me, well, that is your freewill, I for one, do not want to think that my dead loved ones are watching my every move. I want to know I am truly alone when I am in certain places and doing certain things.
As usual, any comments or disagreements can be issued here or sent to me at angie@angieworld.com

Missing

The beginning of August is always a little bumpy for me, Michael’s birthday is today August 9, my mom passed on August 11, and now August 3 will be a little rough as that is the day my brother Jesse passed.
As most of you know I am adopted, everyone should really know that by now as it is, for better or worse, part of my identity.
Jesse was the youngest of my siblings, he was 20 years older than I. Even at that, he was a really great big brother in my teenage years. Jesse always had a mischievous glint in his eyes, even as an adult, you could tell there was something there, just under the surface, waiting to come out. A funny joke, a stinging comeback (for which we are all famous for) or comforting words.
He was equal parts funny, sarcastic, caring and a good son to my parents.
There is one time in particular that always comes to mind:
One day I was sitting in the den watching television and Jesse walked in. He didn’t say a word he just sat down next to me. He sighed heavily instigating the tell me what’s wrong conversation.
He looked at me and said you know Angie I told my kids that they shouldn’t even try to think of anything ornery to do because I’ve done it all. There is nothing you can think of that I have not done.
He was right about that, he was a really ornery child according to my parents. The original Dennis the Menace, please note, in my family orneriness is a gift.
I looked at him and said you’re stupid, you didn’t give your kids a warning, you issued a challenge.
He looked at me and said I realize that now. He went on to say those kids of mine thought of things I would never have thought to do.
I laughed for a solid five minutes because I knew that was true.
All three of his children were true Testerman’s, funny, smart and mischievous in nature. All of those traits are considered positive in my family.
This world will miss his humor, the glint in his eyes, the smile that made you wonder what he was up to and when the other shoe would drop.
I am completely grateful my daughter, Elizabeth Anne, traveled to Owasso with me to say goodbye. There are many things I will never talk about here, just know, that girl is my rock star, my hero, my protector when needed.
As usual, any complaints, comments or just to tell me how awesome I am can be left here or sent to angie@angieworld.com

Single Woman Problems

Anyone ever have lawnmower issues? I’m not talking the machine kind. I’m talking the human kind.
When I first moved here the leasing company had hired a local man to mow the lawn. He did a good job and I hired him to mow the lawn on a permanent basis.
I told him I would like it mowed on Fridays if possible, he said he would fit me in.
Perfect, I was happy, his prices were reasonable and he could come on the day I needed him to. No issues, right?
The first week went by, no one showed, second week, I called and left a voicemail, I said I thought we had made arrangements and if he was not able to fulfill that please let me know so I could hire someone else.
He sends me a text and apologizes profusely saying he would be there the next day. He does show up, mowed the lawn, everything is good.
The next time he shows up on Saturday, at 8pm, to say I wasn’t happy would not be an understatement. I have to work on Sunday, be there early, 8pm on a Saturday is a huge inconvenience for me.
After he mows the lawn he comes to the door for payment, then it got weird, he just stood there talking. I just stared at him. He finally left and I finished out my evening rituals and then he started texting.
I just stared at the phone, why, oh why are you texting me, he was flirting. This was not happening, number one, I pay you, number 2, you are not reliable and last but not least you are not Dean Cain.
Before anyone gets up in arms saying I’m a snob because the man works with his hands, my dad was a mechanic, my ex-husband was a mechanic, my youngest son is an auto body technician and my oldest son runs an auto repair shop. My uncles worked on cars, my cousins, second cousins, I come from a long lineage of blue-collar workers.
So it goes on, I’m not very responsive, but I still need someone to mow the yard. Then comes the weekend where he was a no show on Friday, Saturday comes around, no-show, Sunday same song and dance. He finally shows on Monday, I had left the money under the welcome mat. He took the money and left, he finally shows back up on Wednesday.
I am incredibly fortunate my youngest son’s girlfriend, Elicia was there. She owns her own pool company so her truck basically looks like what people would associate with a man truck.
He mowed that lawn in lightning time, haven’t heard from him since.
I still needed someone to mow the lawn. Well, here’s the rub, I have a lawn mower. It wasn’t working, so I asked Alex to look at it last night.
He was able to fix it and it runs like a dream! I mowed my own yard! Alex did the front last night after he got the mower running. He wanted to make sure it was working.
I have a reliable lawn mower now, me.
I’m still not sure why he thought he could hit on me, I didn’t flirt, I didn’t invite that kind of attention. It was a little disconcerting.
I wonder if Dean knows how to fix a lawn mower, or how to mow a lawn.

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