They say home is where the heart is, while my adopted home is Texas, my heart has always been in Oklahoma. Today my heart is broken, I watched, along with everyone else the destruction that was wrought not by man’s hand but by nature’s hand.
As you all know I am adopted, my family, my blood family, all lives in the areas hit, I am very thankful indeed they are all physically unscathed.
I have lived with the threat of tornadoes the entire time I was growing up; I don’t think I have ever been scared. Until yesterday, and I wasn’t scared for myself, I was scared for my cousins and Aunt and Uncle that are still living. I was scared that something horrible would happen to one of them.
I watched this horrible event unfold, my heart is heavy for my home state, the lives lost, the children. It is unfathomable, while I am heartbroken, my heart has hope, I see the humane side of Oklahoma, once again. That is never far from the surface, my hometown of Owasso was among the first to get a rescue crew together and send help.
If you will remember, Owasso was the first to send help to Joplin, Missouri as well; my heart swells with pride at being able to claim Owasso as my hometown.
Oklahoma may be down right now, but they are not out, we are a resilient state, having been hit with the hardest times in history, we always come back.
For now my prayers are with Oklahoma’s amazing people, do what you can to help them, because believe me, if you needed help they would be there without blinking.
Freedom to Sip Coffee
As I sit here sipping my coffee, thank you Irishman for that, I ponder my freedom to do so, my freedom to sit and browse the internet, read Dear Abby and scan the funnies. I thank God everyday that I was born in a country where I am free to not only sip coffee, but work any job I want to, freedom to vote, freedom to drive, freedom to go shopping without a male escort. Freedom from persecution simply because I am a woman, a Christian woman to boot.
Although that last freedom, freedom of religion, the primary reason the Pilgrims came here (thank you pilgrims) seems to be fading. Well, let’s be honest, freedom to be a Christian, we are asked time and time again to water down our belief system, it is only a matter of time before it becomes a mandate and not a request.
I read recently that the Duck Dynasty family, during contract negotiations, was asked to lessen the talk of God and guns, the head of the family, Phil, reportedly looked at the executives and said no. Power packed two letters, he said if you want us to water down our Christianity and not talk guns then we don’t need to be on television. You see Phil and his family don’t need the money, they have enough, so it wasn’t an issue for them to walk away. A&E backed down, rather quickly from what I read in the news, and signed the crew up for another season.
I am thinking I really need to watch this show, we need more Phil’s in this world, people who stand up for what they believe in, people who don’t care if they are famous. I admit, fame lures me, it teases me, I so would love to be on the radio every day. I have to warn you, I don’t water down my belief system either, God, family, career, that is the way it is supposed to be. If it is any other way, it doesn’t work, as we see with divorce rates, cheating spouses, killings. It is a sad world, it is a world that has forgotten who to put first, I am hopeful though. Hopeful that, we as a country, can not only recognize our freedom of religion roots, but go back to it. No one should have to water down what they think for fear of offending someone else. Yes, there are tactful ways of sharing ones faith without being belligerent, I don’t think that is the way to go either.
In this country, one that was founded by Christians, please don’t use the Thomas Jefferson reference, when one does my eyes glaze over, this is not a great example of a non christian, he fathered children with his slave and then kept them all slaves until he died. Yes, let’s tout him as a great non-christian founding father, seriously, brilliant man, questionable morales. Hmmmm, makes one think, doesn’t it.
I am Baptist, FreeWill Baptist, I am not provincial, nor backwater white trash, I am a simple woman from Owasso, Oklahoma, who loves Jesus, loves coffee, loves shoes and will not be watering down any of those loves.
Accent Thursday
I don’t listen to country music, I would just like to get that out there, well, for the most part, the other part of me thinks what girl doesn’t need a little Tim McGraw from time to time. I was raised on so many genres of music it is hard to explain why I am so loathe to admit listening to this one. I loved Johnny Cash, June Carter, Loretta Lynne and the Oak Ridge Boys when I was growing up. I always loved Alice Cooper, Kiss, ZZ Top and the Commodores, I know, very odd listening habits. As I grew older, disco invaded my life, we have stayed in close contact over they years, my constant companion. However, there are days I must cheat, today was one of those days, not my fault, I have plausible deniability.
I jumped in my car at lunch and when I turned the key over, the soothing tones of Tim McGraw filled the air, I was shocked, how did this happen. Somehow my car radio was set to a country station; I promise you this was not my doing. I did nothing to change the situation, I felt guilt, my old friend disco was waiting for me on 88.5, I still did nothing.
Then it happened, I began to sing along, the absolute horror, then it happened, the very reason I do not listen to country music. When I stopped the car and went inside my destination, I heard the accent come out of my mouth. When I listen to country music my Southern accent is more pronounced. It’s as if someone else takes over and controls my vocal cords, I am helpless to stop it. As helpless as I am to stop my Oklahoma accent whenever I cross the border that takes me home.
I don’t even know how it happens, I don’t know anyone else who experiences this phenomenon, if you do, please tell me. I worked hard at not having an accent and for the most part I succeed, except when I want to have one, but there are times, the most unfortunate times when it comes out. And I am paralyzed, not with fear but with disbelief, where did it come from.
That is the question of the day, where do these accents come from? My parents didn’t have one, my grandmother, well; she had a southern one, and very southern sayings that to this day I repeat. Did I obtain it when I lived in Georgia? No, I had it before then, who can really know for sure where it came from. I think I was born with it, what I would really like to know is where the California Valley girl came from. She is shocking, and yes I have always had that accent, even in school, before it was immortalized by the movie staring the brilliant Nicholas Cage.
Back to me and country music, I am completely enamored by Nashville right now; perhaps that is where the accent is coming from. The show comes on Wednesday nights, I watch Thursday mornings, my accent seems to appear on Thursdays. My longing to listen to Tim McGraw, Faith Hill, Tracy Lawrence and Toby Keith emerge then as well.
I do believe I have solved the mystery of my accent heavy Thursdays.
Question of the Day
If you knew someone’s husband was cheating on them would you tell? What if you didn’t know the wife? What if you knew all parties involved, would you tell? What if you didn’t personally know any of the parties involved? What if you discovered, by going from one persons Tumblr account that had communicated with someone else in a very intimate way; so by going to that Tumblr and doing a search, figured out he was married. It’s crazy what people think they can get away with when they are on the internet.
I don’t know if I would tell because I don’t know these people, and does the wife know? She might, one never knows about these things. However if you could tell anonymously that might be entirely different, but even on the internet is there really such a thing as anonymous. I work in this industry and I am here to tell you that you leave a footprint wherever you go, so be careful out there.
I am still pondering my trip to Oklahoma for my Aunt’s funeral, I have such mixed feelings, on the one hand so sad for the reason for the visit, on the other hand, I am always happy to see my cousins and the remaining aunts and uncle. Also, there is something about the red dirt of Oklahoma that beckons me, it speaks to my soul. It tells me I am home and I am welcome, I always feel like the prodigal daughter when I go, I don’t even have words to properly explain my emotions.
So my dog is acting strange, she used to sleep all night but since I got back from Oklahoma she has been waking up in the middle of the night and wakes me up. She is like a toddler; I think she may be compensating for me being gone for a few days. I do believe the next time I go I will take her; she just cannot go outside in the front by herself. My cousin’s backyard is fenced and she can go in that without other dogs being there. She does have a little indoor dog, but Nocona likes little dogs so I think she will be ok.
So back to my original thought, would you tell if you knew one party of a marriage or relationship was cheating?
Jibberish
I have writers block, I am hoping by writing that I have writers block it will help dissipate it. So far no, still blocked, you would think I would have a lot to write about since I have been gone for a while, however there are things I’m not sure I have permission to write about.
Hmmm, what do I think I can tell, well you all know I was in Oklahoma for my Aunt’s funeral, I don’t feel as if I have permission to write about the actual funeral as that is intensely personal and I do not want to be disrespectful to my cousins or Uncle.
I can tell you it was wonderful seeing my cousins in spite of the circumstances, had a wonderful conversation with my cousins Paula and Cindy. Seeing my Aunt Estelle was icing on the cake, she looks amazing, she will be 100 in July and still has her mind in tact, which is wonderful. Longevity runs in our family, especially for the women, I cannot wait to be 100, I am going to insist everyone wait on me hand and foot. I plan on being incredibly eccentric, insisting everything around me be painted purple, or red, I have yet to decide, maybe one week red, the next purple. I want people to look and me and say wow that old woman is a pistol.
I think my cousin was a little shocked I travel with my own coffee maker, but seriously I cannot leave my coffee to chance, I need coffee in the mornings. It is not even a want or desire it is a NEED, I need the caffeine in order to start my day off correctly. Nothing else works like coffee, it is comforting, awaking to the aroma of coffee brewing, I don’t think I will ever give it up.
Well that is all I feel like writing for now, maybe later I will write about the story my uncle told at the funeral, it was just fantastic and showed exactly how they were with each other.
Headstone
A life well lived, that is what I want on my headstone, I think I have finally decided.
I would like a purple coffin, tons of music, food, fun and laughter. Yes, laughter, I want people to be happy that I went home and to celebrate a life well lived.
They say home is in your heart, I have Jesus in my heart, does that mean I am in heaven on earth?
There are days my mind wanders to what heaven will be like. I imagine it with the streets of gold, which morph into visions of the Elysian fields. Maybe I read too much, nah, no such thing as reading too much. However, I could have watched too many episodes of Hercules and Xena.
The bible tells us that everything we love is in heaven. If that is the case I believe I will see Chewie again, and Arthur and my cat, and definitely Gypsy and Whiskers. I am going to need a big backyard with my mansion.
I believe I will be greeted by my son, mom, dad, grandpa, grandma and Great Aunt Effie. Then I will go visiting, I will see my birth mother, my aunts, uncles and cousins that have gone before me. What a celebration we will have.
When I leave this earth, and no matter how much I think of myself as being immortal, I know it will happen, I want everyone to know I have had a really good time during my tenure here. That my life was worthwhile, that I contributed while I was here. That I did a good job with my children, I had the privilege of raising. I am always amazed God gave me the ones he did.
I want everyone to know how they have influenced my and my thought process. My deep love of Oklahoma, how proud I am to be an “Okie”. To have the influence of Owasso in my life, the stability and acceptance I found there, and my best friend for life.
I would like everyone to know I had morals, that was instilled in me from a young age by my grandparents and later my mom and dad.
How much all of my Sunday School teachers meant to me, how much I respect them. Having been a Sunday School teacher myself I know how much work goes into preparing the lessons. Thank you for sacrificing to teach the classes I was in.
I would like very much to know that my life has meant something, that I was an influence to others as they influenced me. As I am about to travel to Oklahoma to celebrate the life of a woman who influenced many, I think about what will be said about me when I go home.
I wonder if others are ever as preoccupied with these thoughts as I am or if it is a trait unique to my family.
Goals and Reality
I meant to wake up much earlier, however, last night I took two Tylenol pm’s and slept for 12 hours. I have to stop doing that, I don’t like sleeping more than 8 hours, I feel like I am sleeping my life away when that happens.
I have a lot of errands to run, then it is off to Oklahoma, if I decide to go today, I still am undecided, I guess I will know when I get in the car and start driving north. Being in Oklahoma has a way of renewing my soul. Right now I am sitting here, enjoying my coffee, the television is on with an old episode of the Dick Van Dyke show playing. It is a great start to what I know is going to be a great day.
Had a terrific conversation yesterday with a friend regarding goals, listening to God and what to do to achieve the goals that He has in mind for you. I know what I want to do with my life, I think I have always known. I have taken paths that will only enrich what I want to do, what I know I am meant to do with my life. It is my passion, it is my soul, I have been doing it forever on a private basis. In the recent years you all have been the recipient of my passion.
Yes, it is writing, not only writing but writing about my opinions, whether people want to hear them or not, or I guess I should say read them. If you don’t agree with what I have to say, then you have the option to not read.
I have very controversial opinions rattling around in my head, I wold love to write about them, however feel that some people would become incredibly upset. The older I get the more I seriously don’t care if people get upset with my opinions.
Ronald Reagan, I loved him, he stood for things, that today, people are apathetic toward, he stood for pride in America. He stood for defending our country and he loved his wife Nancy above anyone and anything on earth.
I am passionate about history, the history of this country to be exact, I am passionate about knowing what was in the heads and hearts of our ancestors as they fought for freedom. I wonder what they would have thought about the way the country has turned out so far. I am fascinated by Thomas Paine, it was his words that galvanized a rebellion. I would love nothing more than to spend time researching him, going to the LIbrary of Congress to find all of his works, perhaps even a diary or two, to really get into his thought process.
I have so much I want to say and feel I have so little time to say it, well, must stop saying it for now as I do have to start my day, run my errands, pack my bag and run away from home!
Sad Day, No Snow
Yesterday was a trip to the British Emporium in Grapevine, they have the most fascinating things.So, over $100.00 later, we had comfort food for the Irishman, a little taste of home. Then it was Abuelo’s for me, I love Mexican food! Then home, the Irishman is sick, headache, body aches, throat hurts, am hoping I don’t get it. I hate being sick, I rarely get sick, so I shouldn’t get it. I take mega doses of vitamin B and C, so I should be safe.
We got a smattering of snow last night, none stuck, now it is raining, but it is above freezing. I cannot catch a break weather wise, I am hoping this is not an indicator of how my birthday year will go.
Well after a great weekend, it is back to work for me, I am working Monday through Wednesday, then off Thursday and Friday. Jeffrey is having surgery on his back and I am going to take him then take care of him while he recovers. I hope everyone has a great day and for those of you in Oklahoma who are getting snow, I am jealous.
Angie World 