Spam Mail

On my J. O. B. we get a ton of spam email in our company mail. Instead of being frustrated or angry about it we choose to make jokes about it. Throughout the day one can hear hey if we give this guy our bank account information an African Prince will give us a million dollars. Or we can get a cheap car.
Yesterday we all relieved an email touting the ability to get an ex back. It made me think about my exes. I had to think hard, the only ones I could come up with was, well of course my ex-husband and boys from school days past.
I don’t have a lot of exes, so I did the only logical thing I could. I called the Irishman and informed him of the email and suggested we break up so I could see if the information in the missive would in fact get him back.
I was met with silence, as I usually am when I propose something off beat. After a few seconds he said um no, I said why not. He said since we had broken up once that we couldn’t do it again. I said I remember that time, you brought me ice cream. I like ice cream, he has not brought me ice cream since.
What is it with men that once they get you they don’t bring you ice cream? Or Taco Bueno. I would love it if someone surprised me with food. Not like liver or gravy or onions, but anything else yeah. Oh no lettuce either, that’s gross.
I would love it if the Irishman went back to wooing me with ice cream and candy, he used to bring me yellow starbursts because they are my favorite.