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Happy Birthday Dad

Today is my dads’ birthday, when he was born he wasn’t expected to live. He was a twin and he was the smaller one, the midwife told his mother (my great grandmother) that it would be a mercy to let him die. She wasn’t about to allow that to happen. She was a midwife herself. She saved his life and he thrived. I’m awfully glad my great grandmother was so determined.

I’m so happy he was my dad, I know most people feel that way about their parents, but my dad didn’t have to be my dad. He chose to.

The other day I say something on my Facebook timeline that brought an incredibly strong memory of my dad so strongly that I feel the need to document it.

Back in the olden day, 1980 to be precise, there was a shoe craze that overtook the nation. Waffle stompers, I had to have them, I craved them. My mother said no, even back then I loved heels, I wore them all of them time. My mom said that I would never wear them and she was not spending good money on something I would only wear once.

My dad, seeing how sad I was at not getting the shoes, told my mom he would take me shopping for school clothes that year. Mom was relieved, if you have ever taken a teenage girl shopping you will feel her immense relief.

So my dad and I went to Tulsa to go shopping. We hit all of the sales and he let me get what I wanted. It was the best time.

Then we went to JC Penney, to the shoes, I spied the Waffle Stompers. I picked up a pair and looked at them longingly. My dad said try them on, I did and it was love at first step.

My dad bought me the shoes, he told my mom that he wanted me to have them. That was that, it turns out those would be the last shoes my dad ever bought me.

My parents bought me other shoes, but those, they were the ones my dad took me to get.

I kept those shoes until about 4 years ago, when they finally fell apart.

My dad was an amazing man, his laugh could fill your soul with joy and envelope you in warmth. He taught me what a real man is. Kind, generous, loving, funny, smart, God fearing and welcoming.

I’ll always treasure the time I had with my dad, I didn’t get to have him for as long as most people get to have their dads in their lives. I’m grateful for the time I had.

Happy Birthday dad, I hope mom makes you a coconut cake with marshmallow fluff icing.

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Sleeping Royalty

A long time ago in a life far removed from the one I have now I had a king size bed. With king size pillows, that I loved.

Then that life ended and I traded up to a Queen size bed, with standard pillows. Have you ever noticed that? Queen size sheets have standard pillow cases. That’s simply wrong. For many years I lived with the standard pillows. I hated them. I missed the bigger size pillows.

I thought I had to stay with what came with the set, the norm, as it were.

I needed new pillows, Elizabeth Anne had sent me the link for some she had bought on Amazon. I was almost ready to buy but something didn’t let me click the button.

I was at Costco and noticed the pillows, there they were, perfect pillows, ones that stayed cool. One problem, they only had King size pillows. I stood there and thought those won’t fit in my pillow cases. Then it hit me! I could purchase king size pillow cases! Why had this never occurred to me before? I bought the king size pillows, bought new pillow cases and had the best nights sleep ever!

Why I thought I had to suffer all those years with inadequately sized pillows I’ll never know. The point of this whole thing is buy the stupid pillows you want, not what you think is appropriate! Color your hair purple, sing off key at the top of your lungs.

Life is incredibly short, God never intended for us to be miserable for the sake of compliance. Following the teachings of Jesus was at one time the height of rebellion. In some places on this earth it still is.

Be a rebel, buy king size pillows and use them on your queen size bed.

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Sadness With Our World

I have debated on writing about this, but it bothers me so deeply that I don’t have a choice. I don’t know if it will be posted or not, I’ll have to decide once I am done.

I have incredibly white skin, I am not black, I don’t pretend to be black, I don’t have the same experiences as black people.

I’m going to say the thing you aren’t supposed to, I have a lot of black friends. A woman I call my sister has skin darker than mine, her sons call me Auntie. I work with a lot of black people. I do not have the life experiences that they have, I will not sit here and say that I understand their specific struggles over something that can be found in a child’s toy box.

The horrible thing that happened to George Floyd should not happen to anyone. As most people, I have seen the video of the death of George Floyd, it is disturbing to watch. I am not going to pretend I understand why this happened. I just know it should not have, they had handcuffs on him, no one should ever experience a death like that.

I cannot begin to imagine the fear that went his mind as he was losing his life. The very people that we are told to trust should not cause the end of a life in this manner. Ever.

I wish we lived in a Gene Roddenberry world, where we are all judged by our character, not by the way we look. My parents taught me that lesson well, never judge a person by the way they look, judge them by the content of their character. Judge them by their heart, judge them in the way you would want them to judge you.

Unfortunately we don’t, yet, maybe one day, the generations are so much better than the ones that came before. Isn’t that the way it is supposed to be? Ever evolving, doing better than the ones that came before us, not remaining stagnant.

We have so much work to do, this cannot continue, our brothers and sisters should not fear being hunted down by people in a truck with guns. Our brothers and sisters should not fear the people who are entrusted with our safety.

We should ALL be able to teach our children not to fear authority, uniforms, police, ALL children, no matter what shade their skin is should never have to fear the police.

I am saddened and sickened by the past few weeks, things are happening that shouldn’t be.

My heart aches, my soul cries, I don’t want my nephews and grand nephew to have to fear simply because their skin is a different shade.

I pray for a great awakening, if someone claims to be a Christian they should treat others as their fellow man as bothers and sisters.

If someone commits a crime and is going with the police peacefully and not resisting arrest should not fear those same police are going to kill them.

Once again, I do not pretend to know what my friends are going through right now. The fear, the anger, the justified outrage, I just hope they know that my heart is right their with theirs.

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Once and Some Revelations

So, watching Once and Again at this stage in my life I realize how much I have in common with Karen. Played by the incredible Susanna Thompson, the way she portrayed this woman slowly losing her her children (she thinks) as they grow up.

The episode of the first Thanksgiving that Rick and Lily are married, It’s Rick’s holiday with their children.

Her daughter Jessie says mom what are you doing, Karen says she’ll be with friends. Then cancels those plans, because it’s all too much. Sharing a holiday this is uniquely family oriented with someone that is not family, well, it’s too much.

The look that she has, I know it all to well, I understand Karen in a way I didn’t the first time I watched this series.

Every character in this series is just so well done, I really wish it were streaming on something other than YouTube. Some of the episodes are missing and a lot of them are really poor quality. Which is why I had to buy the series. Well the first two seasons.

Speaking of series, let’s talk Stargirl, this series is everything Supergirl should have been. It is pure fun, unadulterated, old fashioned superhero fun.

As you know I really wanted to love Supergirl, but it is so preachy and sudsy and filled with SJW stuff. All of those things belong in a teen angst show, not a superhero show.

None of that is present in Stargirl, so far, I’m two episodes in and am enjoying it immensely.

On a different superhero front, Dean Cain likes two of my tweets in the past week. I believe you all know what that means. It’s just a matter of time.

As

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Memorial Day

Today is one of the most important days for us as a Nation, it is when the United States of America pays homage to our fallen soldiers.

The difference between Memorial Day and Veterans Day is on this day, Memorial Day, we honor our men and women that have fallen in battle.

Veterans Day we honor those who came home.

As most of you know, there has been a member of my lineage fighting for this country since 1774. Since then there has been a member of our family in a branch of the armed services. One of my brothers was in the Army, one in the Navy. Cousins that were in the Air Force, Marines and a nephew in the Air Force. Uncles that fought in WWII and one that fought in Vietnam, my youngest brother was in Vietnam.

We love this country and are willing to put our lives on the line to keep the freedoms that we hold so dear.

I feel that I don’t have the right words to properly express my gratitude to those men and women who put their lives on the line for us. For me, for my family, my children, grandchildren and countless others, so we can enjoy life in this country.

Thank you seems pitiful, seems as if it doesn’t convey how  highly I think of them. How highly we all think of them, it takes someone special to put their lives on hold and join a branch of the military. Especially in these tumultuous times, I know without a doubt I do not have that fortitude.

I truly believe that there is a special place in heaven for those willing to put their lives on the line for others.

God bless each and every one of them, God bless their families for all they have endured without their father, brother, uncle, mother, sister, aunt, cousin at their sides.

Know that we, as a country, thank you for the sacrifices made for the rest of us.

May we all remember that Memorial Day is more than lake time, barbecues, cookouts and a three day weekend.

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Once and a Hair Appointment

I had to do it, I was really forced into this, it’s really not my fault. I was forced into this situation simply because I couldn’t find all of the episodes of Once and Again on YouTube.

Plus the quality was not great, this is a totally justifiable purchase. And what is up with Season 3 not even being on DVD??? I don’t understand what’s happening here! There is no excuse for all of the seasons of this show to no be readily available for me to watch.

I had my hair done on Thursday, the last time I had my hair done was March 13. I think I scared the poor girl because I talked a mile a minute. She was great, she was so happy to be back at work. I admit I tipped more than I normally do, she earned it for listening to me. So my roots are done and I also have caramel highlights framing my face. Plus I got to talk to a real live person in person!

The salon did ask me to wear a face mask and my beautician had a face mask. So I don’t want the Covid police to come for me.

I still need to get my eyebrows done, that’s next.

I hope everyone is having a great weekend.

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Once and Again

Way back in the olden days there was a television show called Once and again. It was hands down one of my favorite shows. It was a slice of life show that was in some part depicting my life at the time.

At the core it was about starting over after a divorce. These two unbelievably beautiful people find each other. Self Ward, who is undeniably one of the most beautiful women in the world played Lily Manning, single mom who meets Billy Campbell who is so good looking it makes my teeth hurt, he played Rick Sammler.

So these two beautiful people find each other and chaos ensues as their children and exes are not having it.

I loved this show because it gave me false hope and at times we all need that to continue on.

The reason I bring this up is because I’ve been looking for it on streaming services. I finally found it on YouTube. Someone uploaded all three seasons. I am delighting in the total angsty sudsiness of it all.

Of course the most beautiful people on earth navigate towards each other and that’s what this show teaches me.

It also makes me very grateful for the children I have. Man alive these kids are whiny!

The show has held up well, the storyline resonates with as much now as it did then. I do like the way Rick doesn’t allow his son to disrespect his mother, Rick’s ex-wife.

Of course his ex-wife is the Borg Queen, Susanna Thompson, so maybe they should all be a little scared.

The show still gives me hope, the possibility of having love in my life, romantic love. I have love in my life.

I have my incredible children, Tessa, family, friends that never cease to amaze me with their loyalty and love.

In case you’re wondering I have not given up on the prettiest man on earth. God is listening and He knows I’ve earned that.

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I Hope I was Useful

As you all know, or should know by now, I have a deep love for Kellie Rasberry of Kidd Kraddick in the Morning fame. I have been listening to the show for so many years, I can’t even count anymore.

Anyway, she does a segment called Love Letters to Kellie, because she is the love expert. Well, now she has a podcast called the same, due to the fact that they received so many letters it was impossible to answer them all on air.

I was listening last week when she read a letter that compelled me to write to the podcast. All of these years and I have never been compelled to write to Kellie. But this letter touched my very soul and I knew I had something positive to contribute to the conversation.

You see it wasn’t a normal love letter, it was a woman writing in asking for advice regarding a teenager she and her husband had taken in. Their nephew, it touched me on many levels, my aunt and uncle had taken me in.

They were having issue integrating him into their lives and he was being a teenager plus add the whole never having had a stable home in his life problems.

Well that can be a mess, I know first hand how that feels, with me being the teenager. I told Kellie that I had been where that boy was right now. I was the troubled teen who was angry and sad and distrustful.

I told them how my great aunt and uncle making the decision to take me in and give me stability for the first time in my life change me. But it wasn’t an easy change, I was resistant, I didn’t trust it, I was waiting for them to change their mind and  dump me off at the next relatives house.

I was horrible, even more than a normal teenager, but they stayed consistent, they showed me by their actions that they were not sending me anywhere. Eventually I began to trust them and they became my parents in every way, even legally.

Today, on my lunch, I was listening to the new episode of the podcast and they gave an update on how the woman was doing. She said that things were so much better, that she had asked her husband listen to her letter being read by Kellie. After that his attitude toward the boy changed, he has begun including him in conversations and asking him questions. Getting his opinion on movies, shows and games and things. While some might not thing this is a big deal, it is, to this teenage it is, and I love it.

Several people had written in after the previous episode who had been through the same thing, taking in a teenage relative. They asked her if any had been helpful, she said yes, that everyone had given her some good advice and good information and also resources.

She then said that the response of the woman who had been through the same thing as the teen had touched her. Especially the part where she had been awful, waiting to be thrown out again, not trusting.

I started to cry listening, let me tell you tears and spaghetti squash do not go together.

I thanked God in that moment, if any of my experiences can help one person here on earth then it was worth it.

I highly recommend the Love Letters podcast along with A Sandwich and Some Lovin.

That’s all I have for now, I hope you all have a great day and Thank Goodness Tomorrow is My Friday!

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Happy Mother’s Day

What can I say about my mom that I haven’t already said?

I had the best mom, hands down, way better than anyone else’s. That’s a very incendiary statement, I know, but it’s true.

My mom didn’t have to be my mom, at a time in her life when she should have been relaxing and traveling the world she and my dad decided to take a troubled teen into their home.

That’s a really brave decision, I’ll be honest, I don’t think I could do what they did.

I’ll be grateful to them for all of my life and beyond. I have told my children of the sacrifices that their grandmother made to take me and raise me.

I’ll tell my granddaughter about her great grandmother and the sacrifices she made in order to give me a much better life.

Because of my mother I had a good foundation that I could build on in order to raise my children.

I may not have been the best mom in the world (I already had that so my kids got me) but I was way better than I would have been without my amazing mom’s influence.

I always feel extremely blessed that God have me the children that He did. They are all amazing, smart, funny, sarcastic, snarky, kind, caring and beautiful humans. I seriously cannot imagine life without them. I’m so proud of the adults that they have become.

Happy Mother’s Day to all of the moms out there, but especially the ones that raise the children that aren’t born to them.

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A Soapbox and a High Horse

Please wait while I get my soapbox out to climb on my high horse, because I feel a full fledged Angie Rant coming on.

One would think that with all in the world going on that these things would stop making the rounds.

I am talking about the meme saying that if you don’t cook or clean you are not a real woman, or the one that says if you don’t have curves you are not a real woman, or the one that says if you are fat you are not a real woman.

I consider myself a real woman, but let’s take inventory shall we:

I am not skinny

I am a horrible cook

I am a horrible housekeeper

I also cannot get a man to look at me to save my life.

According to some that would make me not a real woman.

I can configure a router, I can talk superheroes with the best of them, I can eat what other people cook, I can read, I am a decent writer, I am very charming and can hold a great conversation, and the pièce de résistance I raised three amazing humans. As a single mother, although I did not raise them alone, they had a dad, a very involved dad. I love Jesus Christ, that should make me a real woman, but sadly, according to the internet it does not.

I look to twitter to find out what a real woman is, it is even more confusing. Because the Conservative women and the Liberal women are constantly battling. For the record, I am an Independent woman.

According to the Conservative women I have to be attractive, a great cook, keep an impeccable house.

According to the Liberal women I have to hate Conservatives, be above men and not have a non emotional argument.

I am neither of those things, I believe in equal rights, I am not a feminist, I am an equal rights advocate. No one above the other, I also believe in real arguments, non emotional ones.

My daughter is a real woman, she can cook cereal, she owns her own farm and works harder than anyone I know. My dad and grandfather would be incredibly proud of her. She is an animal whisperer, the Ellie Mae of Texas. She is also beautiful, intelligent, funny and amazing.

My daughter-in-law is a real woman, she has 4 children and took on a bonus one in my granddaughter. She works in the medical field and is on the front lines. According to her she is not a great cook (I beg to differ), she keeps an impeccable house. She is also funny and smart and beautiful.

My other daughter-in-law is a real woman, she is smart, funny, beautiful and another hard worker. She is a great cook, keeps an impeccable house and has owned her own business. She is also handy and can fix anything.

We are all different, we all bring something different to the table. We are all real women, we look different, we are different at different things and we all see the value in each other.

Why can’t women everywhere do that? Why do we have to pitted against each other and say oh if you can’t cook then you are not a real woman?

I am watching a show on Hulu about the ratification of the ERA (Equal Rights Amendment). Women were at each others throat over this thing. The ERA needed to be an amendment, we were never going to get equal pay or anything else without it.

But it goes deeper than women’s rights, it is the Equal Rights Amendment, we all deserve equal rights in this country. In The United States of America, one nation, under God, Indivisible, with Liberty and Justice for ALL.

Not for a few, for ALL. It’s right there in the pledge of allegiance.

We cannot forget that, ALL, equal rights not for a few but for ALL of America’s citizens.

Climbing off of my high horse now, putting up my soapbox and relaxing for the rest of the evening.