I finally did it, I broke down and watched the remake of Red Dawn, ok, so it was to watch Thor in action while he is busy filming another, well Thor movie. It was not as bad as I expected it to be, if you take it for what it is, then it was enjoyable. While it did not inspire me to randomly yell Wolverines, the way the first one does, I did not hate it.
Today will be spent seeing Oz with the Irishman, very excited about that, although it will be hard going to the movies and not getting a diet coke. I am down two weeks and have not broken once. I think if I can keep this up for another 2 weeks it will become habit, after that smooth sailing.
You know, watching Thor in a different movie makes me want to watch Thor and The Avengers again, I am sensing a theme to my weekend.
Next week is my last week on my current schedule, I shall miss having three days off in a row, however, working two days on, one day off then two days of work then two days off doesn’t suck. It’s ok if you want to be jealous that I can actually have three days off in the week.
I was sick all last week, I am now feeling a little better, still kinda run down and tired, however that could be due to the fact that I have rested too much. On the other hand I don’t want to over do it and become sick again, ugh, the vicious cycle. I still don’t understand why I could have had a glamorous illness after 16 months of sick free. Upper respiratory was the best my body could come up with. Simply not cool.
Off I go to dress for my movie date with the Irishman, what to wear, what to wear. That is the question of the day.
BBFF
I have taken some time off because I have been as sick as the proverbial dog, I am doing better this morning, although now I have no voice. Good thing I don’t have to talk for this part of my life.
This is a little late in coming, however, I would like to tell you all about the Conversations show that aired last Saturday. It was part 2 of Can Men and Women be Just Friends, without the romance part getting in the way. As the majority of you know, my best friend is male, we have been best friends for 15 years now. And yes, it has always been friendship, none of the other stuff getting in the way. I knew our relationship was special, because it is a great friendship, I didn’t realize it was unique until we started talking about it to, well, all of you. To me it is a normal, healthy, friendship, early on we both realized what a special friendship we had and decided none of the other stuff was ever going to come into play.
If you want to hear his take on the friendship you can listen via mine and Shanon J’s website convosate.com, the show is up and ready for you to click.
I started thinking about the legacy he and I are leaving for our respective children, my daughter has a BBFF (boy best friend forever) as well. They have been friends for years, since high school, their friendship continues today. I feel proud that I set an example that men and women can be simply friends. She has seen this growing up and it is normal for her.
Now my BBFF has a son, and he is setting an example for his son that he can have these types of friendships without anything else going on. It is a unconscious happening, something that they just see and take as normal.
It should be the norm, not the exception, however, I am learning it is not. I was speaking with a man at work about it and he said he was interested in listening to the show. He went on to say he has tried to be friends with women and they always go off in the direction of oh he’s paying attention to me, oh he must like me.
The thing is, if you want to be friends with someone of the opposite sex, you must have the conversation, the open, honest one, where both parties agree that the friendship is more important than anything else. We have never once been inappropriate with each other, our lives are transparent, anyone can look in at any time and see what is going on. I am proud to call this man my friend, he is honest, caring, honorable (a trait that is quickly fading in this society) good-looking, incredibly intelligent (he keeps me on my toes) and funny. Oh he’s single as well ladies, his sister and I are taking applications, you have to go through both of us for approval.
So, go out, look for friendship, your lives will be richer for it.
Weight Loss
So today is Monday, after a very busy weekend, I find that I need a few days to recover, well that is not going to happen. So here I am, up, awake, ready to make the money, drinking coffee, waking up. I think being around sick people has finally infected me, I woke up stuffy with a scratchy throat, I am not happy.
I have avoided being sick for over a year, one year and 4 months to be exact, why me, why now! I put a double dose of honey in my coffee, hopefully that will help. Other than that I am doing well, cravings are gone for sugar, for now, I think by eating natural sugars that has been a huge help. I do need to go at lunch and get some fruit; I did not have time to stop on the way to work this morning. So yogurts for breakfast, at lunch go get fruit and stay on my new life changing way of eating.
I weighed this morning and I have lost 4.5 pounds, not bad, especially since I don’t exercise, so life is all good. This will be short as I am starving and must fight the hunger until I can find fruit.
My Girl
More Issues
Well, I have made it to my Friday, I did stop at Starbucks, I know you are wondering what I was able to get that fits in with my diet. Well, I got an unsweetened Passion tea and a fruit cup, both 0 Weight Watcher points. So far so good, I have had no sugar this week, since Sunday, Sunday was my last hurrah, I had everything then. It was actually a relief not to eat sugar on Monday, however, by Tuesday it was not pleasant, the cravings were hitting me with a vengeance last night, but I did not cave.
I don’t think anyone understands the depth of my addiction; some of my friends are all like, just have one cookie, or one piece of candy. That is all well and good for someone who has self control, however, for me that one would turn into twenty. I have no control when it comes to sweets, I can give up pasta, bread, pizza and even puffy Cheetos with no issues, but the sugar. I have such a hard time with it; I don’t think anyone understands that.
Ok, so, yesterday I read these tips on how you can burn calories and how these activities will keep you thin. One of them was bouncing your legs, WHAT, I do that like crazy, I have all my life, according to this article I should weigh like 8 pounds. Oh maybe if I didn’t do it I would weigh 8 million pounds, maybe it is the only thing keeping me down to this level. Wow, I never thought of that, maybe I should be grateful I am not 8 million pounds; I still wish I were the 8 pounds. And no, I do not actually want to weigh 8 pounds, it is an exaggeration to illustrate my obsession with weight.
Ok people, I hope you all have a fantastic Thursday; I shall be working for “the man”, earning my wages so I can buy shoes.
Single Mom Thoughts
I am on day three with no sugar, by tomorrow I should be a treat to be around. By Friday it should be really fun, seriously, I am like an alcoholic with the sugar. I am Jonesing pretty bad right now. I am looking at my vitamins wanting to eat the whole bottle. I know what you are thinking, what the heck, well I have Flintstones sour gummies vitamins, they taste like candy. It is becoming hard to just eat my two a day, by tomorrow I should probably remove them so I don’t eat the whole thing.
So yesterday, on of the people I follow on twitter posted a story about a man who tased a 5 year old child, repeatedly. Who does that you may be wondering, well, a moron, a brute named Phillip Hudson, Jr. the ex-boyfriend of the child’s mother. Apparently he had been abusing the boy for years, when asked why he used a taser, he responded with spankings were leaving bruises so he decided to tase the child. There were multiple taser burns on the little boy, this had been going on for a while, and the mother was having the ex-boyfriend babysit while she was at work. He was caught when the little boy went to school and complained of his arm hurting, the teacher pulled up his sleeve to see what was going on and saw the bruises and took him to the nurse who called the police. Then the whole story came out, the abuse he had suffered for years. Years. This child is Tessa’s age, I cannot imagine what I would do if someone did that to her.
All we can do is pray for this little boy, not only that his body heals, but his soul as well. This is so sad and a prime example of why I did not date when my children were young. There was no way I was taking a chance with their physical well being, emotional well being or any part of their well being. I always wanted them to feel like their home was safe; they knew what was waiting for them in my home, just us, no strange men, and no abusive men, just us.
I did everything in my power to keep my children safe from harm, I hope I succeeded, I know for a fact that as adults they appreciate the fact that I did not have a revolving door. There were no new boyfriends, no “uncle daddy” as Kidd Kraddick calls Kellie Rasberry’s dates. I am really proud of the fact that I kept my children from that kind of drama; they didn’t need it in my household.
So single mothers out there, please think before you date, please think before you bring anyone into your home, please think of your children first, yourself last. That is the way it should be, your children didn’t ask to be here, you brought them into life. Make sure they have the best life you are able to provide.
Where is my Winter?
It is snowing everywhere but here. Even in Texas it’s all around me, but not where I am, it is like there is a bubble around the Dallas area. I know I wax on in regard s to snow, however, I love it. I always have, I remember once when I was around 4, and it snowed all night. The next morning I jumped out of bed and ran outside. I laid in the snow right in my pajamas; I was beyond happy, until Grandma hollered at me to come in and get dressed and eat my breakfast like a normal child. As you can see I have had a lifelong affair with the white stuff.
It’s not only snow I love, its clouds, rain, lightening and thunder. I am not a fan of sunshine, yes; I do realize that puts me in the minority. I realize I live in the wrong part of the country, however it is where my children are and I will continue to live here and suffer, in not so much silence.
There are times when the clouds are dark and heavy, I feel as if I can reach out and touch them. I feel their heaviness envelope me, it gives me comfort. It’s God’s blanket wrapped around me.
Coming home yesterday evening, there was a definite line. Sunshine on one side, beautiful dark clouds converging on the other, I felt comforted by the sight.
I know it is an odd happening, me being happy being surrounded by dark and dreary and depressed in the sunshine. I wilt in the heat and come alive in the cold. The opposite of the majority of humans. My winter is a bust; I sit here wondering what I did to anger God. Why is He withholding His love from me? I don’t understand why I can’t have just one day of snow.
Irritated
I am really irritated right now, why you ask, well I shall tell you. I was watching old episodes of Sex in the City, while, like millions of women, I like the show, it still makes me angry. Carrie and her friends make some of the stupidest mistakes I have ever seen. I don’t know why I watch the show because I always end up yelling at the television.
Case in point, when Carrie first starts seeing Big she finds out he goes to church every Sunday with his mother, she tries to finagle her way in. He flat-out tells her no, this is a special time for just him and his mother. So instead of accepting this answer, Carrie, who apparently has never darkened a churches doorstep, dons the biggest hat she can, drags Miranda and off they go. They proceed to be as disruptive as they possibly can in the house of God. After the service she makes her way to Big to force an introduction, where he introduces her as a friend.
Her feelings get hurt, she confronts him and he, rightfully, blasts her, tells her he was not ready to introduce her to his mother as that is an important step. She is crushed, her friends tell her of course she is in the right. Well she wasn’t, she was so beyond wrong it was bordering on crazy.
If any woman tries to copy any of these women it really explains why they are suffering, these four women are exaggerations of the way real women behave or should behave. Why would anyone deify these four characters? I admit I watched, I enjoyed, but my enjoyment was in yelling at the wrongs that were happening. I also admit to being a little like Samantha in the fact that I love me, not the whole whore part. And yes I fully believe she is a whore, she will have sex with anything that moves. I don’t believe that is what God intended for us to do with our bodies.
So there you have it people, my Sunday morning rant, in conclusion perhaps it would be better if I watched something that calms me. I am getting older and I do not want to have a stroke while watching Sex in the City, talk about cliché.
Back to Weight Issues
So I messed up big time, I stopped doing Weight Watchers and tried to do it on my own, I fell off the wagon big time, started eating sugary treats and doing whatever I wanted. Well people for the first time in a long time I weighed myself. Shocking to say the least.
Needless to say, I am back on the wagon, I started this morning counting what I ate, and will be doing so from now on. I am also thinking exercise time is in order. This is just shocking to say the least, I must get control of myself before summer gets here and I have to go to my family reunion as fat as well the proverbial calf.
I have also decided to give up diet cokes, I have been reading a lot about the chemicals and artificial sweeteners, and have decided it is not for me. So here I sit, with my sad dietary restrictions, we all know I will rail against this.
I shall sign off for now, pray for me, for my resolve, my determination to look good. Remember for me it is not about being healthy, it is all about the looks. I don’t even know how many ways I can see this.
The Irishman, Evil or Thoughtful?
I sit here this morning pondering a deep question, is the Irishman evil incarnate or incredibly thoughtful. I know what you are thinking, and yes that is my pondering for today. Why you ask, a very good question indeed. Last night he brought home three boxes of thin mints. Three. I will let that sink in for a moment.
These are my weakness, I only bought one box myself, and yes that box is completely gone, I ate it in one day. Ugh. No I do not feel good about myself for doing that, my weakness for chocolate is well documented. Anyway, this is not about me, it is about the three boxes yelling my name from the kitchen.
He brings them home and says I know these are your favorite. Before you can ask, is this completely altruistic, he can’t eat them, they are definitely not gluten free. So there you have it, three boxes of guilty goodness waiting for me to tear into. Ok, you got me, two and a half now.
Maybe he wants me to be 500 pounds, maybe that’s why he brought them home, or maybe he did it simply because he knows how much I love them and wanted me to have something I enjoy. You decide, I am still up in the air about all of this and what it actually means.
Anyone who knows me knows that I have to analyze everything until I have it completely torn apart and it no longer resembles what it started out as. Yes, I do realize that sounds crazy.
Angie World 