Ok, so, this has to be a hoax, I just read on the Internet, that cannot be trusted, that Dean Cain is married! And it’s not to me!!! How can this be? How can Dean Cain be married and it not be me?
Pesky reality facts do not matter here; I am seriously wounded if this is true. Yes, I know, he has never met me, the likelihood of him meeting me are zero, however, this does not lesson my fantasy pain.
Oh, and yes, I do realize I am engaged to a real life man, like I said, details are irrelevant in this situation. I am wounded to my core! What am I supposed to do with this gossip?
You know it’s a sad, sad day when one cannot open a browser and see bad news. I fully believed he would be eternally single; waiting on me, the one, he would never meet.
I shall never recover from this betrayal of my fake boyfriend, like EVER. I have turned on my internal dialogue with a valley girl accent, yes, it is that bad. Superman has left the building, no, the planet, never to be seen again.
I shall mourn our fake relationship with all of the attention it deserves. And while I know the below photo is not Dean, it is Superman. Let us all take a moment to mourn the married state of Superman.