So this weekend, while I was spending time with Elizabeth Anne, she asked if I had been listening to Kidd Kraddick. I said no, I had been sick; she was like I cannot believe you missed Love Letters to Kellie. She then went on to tell me about a letter, a man, writing in to tell Kellie his wife had lost weight and he didn’t like it. She had been 275 pounds when they got married and now she was 200. He was angry, he married a fatty and that was what he wanted, his words, not mine. He missed his pillow, which was what he said; he wanted to know how he could make her gain the weight back. Hmmm, odd, usually it is men wanting their women to lose weight.
It seems that when a man says I love you just the way you are, he means it, there is no room for change, losing weight, hair color change or the onset of wrinkles. Men should be honest, tell women from the onset, listen, this is the way I found you, I don’t want any changes, it doesn’t matter how many children you have, you need to remain the same. And whatever happens don’t get wrinkles, don’t lose/gain weight just never change.
Men on the other hand can let themselves go; they lose their hair, get beer bellies, and a host of other things. Doesn’t matter, we are expected to remain by their sides, but society believes it is ok for a man to trade a woman in on something new, seemingly improved, different.
What happened to loyalty? How are these men bred? Who breeds them? What kind of parent raises a son to adulthood with the thought that they should just go through life wrecking havoc, tossing aside loyal women simply because their bodies change?
At times there is the exception to the rule, not all men do this, however the majority do, we see it all the time, especially in Hollywood. Women are tossed aside for the new and exciting; however, in Hollywood women have attorneys and can exact vengeance. Take Demi Moore, she is furious at being tossed aside and embarrassed by Ashton Kutcher, she is exacting monetary revenge.
I don’t know what the answer is, all I know is I wish men were honest creatures, by nature most are not. I for one am tired of hearing I love you just the way you are, it is a half lie, they do love you the way you are in the moment they meet you. If you want to stay with your chosen one whatever you do, don’t change. EVER.
Once again there are exceptions to the rule, no hate mail please.
Weekend Update
This weekend was a little busy after a week of not doing anything but trying to get better. Friday I actually went to the grocery store because I ran out of soup, it felt strange leaving the house. I had not left since going to the doctor on Tuesday. That wore me out, so back home to rest, put groceries away, rest again, put more away, rest some more, then bed. I know, my exciting life can barely be contained.
Saturday was movie date day, the Irishman and I went to see Oz the Great and Powerful, I enjoyed it. I thought the movie was a lot of fun, very much in the spirit of the Oz books. That wore me out, so back home to continue recovery.
Sunday was spent in Bonham, I actually went to see my amazing daughter and her “children” the baby chicks are doing nicely. I took Nocona with me so she could visit with her other furry friends; saw Mickey, who is going to be 20 this year. He is still feisty, I can’t believe that cat is doing so well; I still remember when we got him and his brother Arthur. I still miss Arthur; our pets really do become our family members, especially in this family. We become very attached, they have personality, they are loyal and never reveal our secrets. Way better than some humans I know.
Sunday was also dinner date night, or I should say evening, we had old people’s dinner, it was a very nice ending to the weekend.
I have nothing huge to announce, this past weeks show is not up yet on the site, you all will have to wait for it. It is worth the wait, believe me, we had a great guest, very powerful and wise words. If you did not get to listen live, you will totally want to catch it when it posts.
This coming Saturday is going to be really good; we have Pastor Purvey back in studio discussing dating while being a single parent. As most of you know I did not date while my children were growing up, I felt it was best for our family. I didn’t believe they needed the unsettling life of never knowing who was going to be there. I knew I was not going to get re-married while they were still at home, so why date, why introduce my children to someone who was not going to be around long term. Shanon and I wanted to know what effects it has on the children when this does go on and who better to ask than a youth minister who sees the after effects. It is a fantastic conversation and I cannot wait to share it with everyone.
Simply me
Movie Day
I finally did it, I broke down and watched the remake of Red Dawn, ok, so it was to watch Thor in action while he is busy filming another, well Thor movie. It was not as bad as I expected it to be, if you take it for what it is, then it was enjoyable. While it did not inspire me to randomly yell Wolverines, the way the first one does, I did not hate it.
Today will be spent seeing Oz with the Irishman, very excited about that, although it will be hard going to the movies and not getting a diet coke. I am down two weeks and have not broken once. I think if I can keep this up for another 2 weeks it will become habit, after that smooth sailing.
You know, watching Thor in a different movie makes me want to watch Thor and The Avengers again, I am sensing a theme to my weekend.
Next week is my last week on my current schedule, I shall miss having three days off in a row, however, working two days on, one day off then two days of work then two days off doesn’t suck. It’s ok if you want to be jealous that I can actually have three days off in the week.
I was sick all last week, I am now feeling a little better, still kinda run down and tired, however that could be due to the fact that I have rested too much. On the other hand I don’t want to over do it and become sick again, ugh, the vicious cycle. I still don’t understand why I could have had a glamorous illness after 16 months of sick free. Upper respiratory was the best my body could come up with. Simply not cool.
Off I go to dress for my movie date with the Irishman, what to wear, what to wear. That is the question of the day.
BBFF
I have taken some time off because I have been as sick as the proverbial dog, I am doing better this morning, although now I have no voice. Good thing I don’t have to talk for this part of my life.
This is a little late in coming, however, I would like to tell you all about the Conversations show that aired last Saturday. It was part 2 of Can Men and Women be Just Friends, without the romance part getting in the way. As the majority of you know, my best friend is male, we have been best friends for 15 years now. And yes, it has always been friendship, none of the other stuff getting in the way. I knew our relationship was special, because it is a great friendship, I didn’t realize it was unique until we started talking about it to, well, all of you. To me it is a normal, healthy, friendship, early on we both realized what a special friendship we had and decided none of the other stuff was ever going to come into play.
If you want to hear his take on the friendship you can listen via mine and Shanon J’s website convosate.com, the show is up and ready for you to click.
I started thinking about the legacy he and I are leaving for our respective children, my daughter has a BBFF (boy best friend forever) as well. They have been friends for years, since high school, their friendship continues today. I feel proud that I set an example that men and women can be simply friends. She has seen this growing up and it is normal for her.
Now my BBFF has a son, and he is setting an example for his son that he can have these types of friendships without anything else going on. It is a unconscious happening, something that they just see and take as normal.
It should be the norm, not the exception, however, I am learning it is not. I was speaking with a man at work about it and he said he was interested in listening to the show. He went on to say he has tried to be friends with women and they always go off in the direction of oh he’s paying attention to me, oh he must like me.
The thing is, if you want to be friends with someone of the opposite sex, you must have the conversation, the open, honest one, where both parties agree that the friendship is more important than anything else. We have never once been inappropriate with each other, our lives are transparent, anyone can look in at any time and see what is going on. I am proud to call this man my friend, he is honest, caring, honorable (a trait that is quickly fading in this society) good-looking, incredibly intelligent (he keeps me on my toes) and funny. Oh he’s single as well ladies, his sister and I are taking applications, you have to go through both of us for approval.
So, go out, look for friendship, your lives will be richer for it.
Weight Loss
So today is Monday, after a very busy weekend, I find that I need a few days to recover, well that is not going to happen. So here I am, up, awake, ready to make the money, drinking coffee, waking up. I think being around sick people has finally infected me, I woke up stuffy with a scratchy throat, I am not happy.
I have avoided being sick for over a year, one year and 4 months to be exact, why me, why now! I put a double dose of honey in my coffee, hopefully that will help. Other than that I am doing well, cravings are gone for sugar, for now, I think by eating natural sugars that has been a huge help. I do need to go at lunch and get some fruit; I did not have time to stop on the way to work this morning. So yogurts for breakfast, at lunch go get fruit and stay on my new life changing way of eating.
I weighed this morning and I have lost 4.5 pounds, not bad, especially since I don’t exercise, so life is all good. This will be short as I am starving and must fight the hunger until I can find fruit.
My Girl
More Issues
Well, I have made it to my Friday, I did stop at Starbucks, I know you are wondering what I was able to get that fits in with my diet. Well, I got an unsweetened Passion tea and a fruit cup, both 0 Weight Watcher points. So far so good, I have had no sugar this week, since Sunday, Sunday was my last hurrah, I had everything then. It was actually a relief not to eat sugar on Monday, however, by Tuesday it was not pleasant, the cravings were hitting me with a vengeance last night, but I did not cave.
I don’t think anyone understands the depth of my addiction; some of my friends are all like, just have one cookie, or one piece of candy. That is all well and good for someone who has self control, however, for me that one would turn into twenty. I have no control when it comes to sweets, I can give up pasta, bread, pizza and even puffy Cheetos with no issues, but the sugar. I have such a hard time with it; I don’t think anyone understands that.
Ok, so, yesterday I read these tips on how you can burn calories and how these activities will keep you thin. One of them was bouncing your legs, WHAT, I do that like crazy, I have all my life, according to this article I should weigh like 8 pounds. Oh maybe if I didn’t do it I would weigh 8 million pounds, maybe it is the only thing keeping me down to this level. Wow, I never thought of that, maybe I should be grateful I am not 8 million pounds; I still wish I were the 8 pounds. And no, I do not actually want to weigh 8 pounds, it is an exaggeration to illustrate my obsession with weight.
Ok people, I hope you all have a fantastic Thursday; I shall be working for “the man”, earning my wages so I can buy shoes.
Single Mom Thoughts
I am on day three with no sugar, by tomorrow I should be a treat to be around. By Friday it should be really fun, seriously, I am like an alcoholic with the sugar. I am Jonesing pretty bad right now. I am looking at my vitamins wanting to eat the whole bottle. I know what you are thinking, what the heck, well I have Flintstones sour gummies vitamins, they taste like candy. It is becoming hard to just eat my two a day, by tomorrow I should probably remove them so I don’t eat the whole thing.
So yesterday, on of the people I follow on twitter posted a story about a man who tased a 5 year old child, repeatedly. Who does that you may be wondering, well, a moron, a brute named Phillip Hudson, Jr. the ex-boyfriend of the child’s mother. Apparently he had been abusing the boy for years, when asked why he used a taser, he responded with spankings were leaving bruises so he decided to tase the child. There were multiple taser burns on the little boy, this had been going on for a while, and the mother was having the ex-boyfriend babysit while she was at work. He was caught when the little boy went to school and complained of his arm hurting, the teacher pulled up his sleeve to see what was going on and saw the bruises and took him to the nurse who called the police. Then the whole story came out, the abuse he had suffered for years. Years. This child is Tessa’s age, I cannot imagine what I would do if someone did that to her.
All we can do is pray for this little boy, not only that his body heals, but his soul as well. This is so sad and a prime example of why I did not date when my children were young. There was no way I was taking a chance with their physical well being, emotional well being or any part of their well being. I always wanted them to feel like their home was safe; they knew what was waiting for them in my home, just us, no strange men, and no abusive men, just us.
I did everything in my power to keep my children safe from harm, I hope I succeeded, I know for a fact that as adults they appreciate the fact that I did not have a revolving door. There were no new boyfriends, no “uncle daddy” as Kidd Kraddick calls Kellie Rasberry’s dates. I am really proud of the fact that I kept my children from that kind of drama; they didn’t need it in my household.
So single mothers out there, please think before you date, please think before you bring anyone into your home, please think of your children first, yourself last. That is the way it should be, your children didn’t ask to be here, you brought them into life. Make sure they have the best life you are able to provide.
Where is my Winter?
It is snowing everywhere but here. Even in Texas it’s all around me, but not where I am, it is like there is a bubble around the Dallas area. I know I wax on in regard s to snow, however, I love it. I always have, I remember once when I was around 4, and it snowed all night. The next morning I jumped out of bed and ran outside. I laid in the snow right in my pajamas; I was beyond happy, until Grandma hollered at me to come in and get dressed and eat my breakfast like a normal child. As you can see I have had a lifelong affair with the white stuff.
It’s not only snow I love, its clouds, rain, lightening and thunder. I am not a fan of sunshine, yes; I do realize that puts me in the minority. I realize I live in the wrong part of the country, however it is where my children are and I will continue to live here and suffer, in not so much silence.
There are times when the clouds are dark and heavy, I feel as if I can reach out and touch them. I feel their heaviness envelope me, it gives me comfort. It’s God’s blanket wrapped around me.
Coming home yesterday evening, there was a definite line. Sunshine on one side, beautiful dark clouds converging on the other, I felt comforted by the sight.
I know it is an odd happening, me being happy being surrounded by dark and dreary and depressed in the sunshine. I wilt in the heat and come alive in the cold. The opposite of the majority of humans. My winter is a bust; I sit here wondering what I did to anger God. Why is He withholding His love from me? I don’t understand why I can’t have just one day of snow.
