Confession

I have a confession to make, it’s a little embarrassing, ok a lot embarrassing. I don’t even know if I want to admit this, even to myself, perhaps saying the words out loud will help me begin to heal.

I think I’m turning into a hippie, I know! The embarrassment! Ok, so stay with me, I’ll get to why I believe such an outrageous thing.

It’s not the healthy eating, the going organic has always been in my DNA. I come from farm stock, to us organic is just food. Real food, grown in your garden food, it is not surprising I would return to this. No, it’s not that in itself, the unhealthy attachment I am developing witch Whole Foods is one factor.

But that in itself is not enough, perhaps it is the pesticide free cleaning supplies I am purchasing or maybe it’s the essential oil obsession.

Yes, that is the one, lately I have really gotten into essential oils. Their purpose, their uses, what ailments can they cure. I’ve never liked going to the doctor. Now before anyone criticizes me, if I found a lump or had serious symptoms I would consult a physician.

There are some things though, that home remedies are best. I don’t feel the need to pump my body full of antibiotics or painkillers when I can take care of simple ailments naturally. I fully believe God has given us so much on this earth we can use. I also believe He gave us doctors as well.

Am I turning into a hippie? I hope not, I enjoy using underarm deodorant too much for that to happen.

But I am going to continue to explore oils and herbs and spices for healing and cleaning.

If anyone ever sees me in Birkenstocks and flowy things, for the love of all that is holy please hit me.

Yesterday

Yesterday I had the privilege of attending the memorial service for my friend Gail. She had an amazing send off and I know she would have been humbled to hear all of the words of praise directed towards her.

I talk about funerals a lot, I have been attending them since I was 5 years old. I don’t think a year goes by without me going to one.

Saying goodbye is never easy, but saying goodbye when you know it isn’t goodbye, it is a see you later is a joyous happening. I know without one doubt I will see Gail again, I will get to tell her if Tessa really did name a daughter after her. That is a story all in itself. I will see her infectious smile again, hear her laughter and catch up on everything she has seen and done in Heaven.

The drive home was not a happy occassion, there was a semi overturned and gas was everywhere. They shut the entire highway down, the entire highway, both sides.

It literally took me almost 4 hours to go less than 5 miles.

I posted it on Facebook, one woman thought it was hysterical. I took umbrage with her assessment, naturally. I don’t even know what kind of person finds that funny. I most certainly would not find it funny if someone said they were stuck like that. This was not a traffic jam, let’s be clear, I leave far enough out where those are not an issue. This was the whole highway shutting down for a semi truck driver that could not control his truck. The second time this year, I believe, in the same spot. What is going on that truck drivers are doing this? I hate driving next to those semis, I had one that almost pushed me off of a bridge in Oklahoma. Since then I have hated driving anywhere near them. The drivers don’t pay attention, they believe the road belongs to them and they don’t care how many wrecks they cause. Isn’t there some kind of test before they get their commercial license? There should be a better one if there is.

Well I broke down and have bought a new washer, it will be here today. I tried to have my old one repaired, the repair man was extremely aged and I thought he was going to have a stroke or heart attack working on my machine. There were many grunts, groans and profuse sweating, after three hours he said he couldn’t fix it. Now I will tell you that whatever he did, made it work for a few weeks. Maybe all that pushing and pulling did something, so it lasted a little longer. The new one will be here today, thank goodness.

That’s all I really have for now, there are a lot of things in my head, but none that can or should come out right now.

As usual you can contact me here or at angie@angieworld.com.

February

Well it has been a month so far. Usually February is the best month of the year, I did have a great birthday. But it’s have also lost two friends this month.

I’ve already been to the funeral of one and the next is this coming Thursday. My heart is broken over the loss of these two amazing women. Each one different on how they tackled their worlds, but both of them phenomenal in their own right.

The first was supremely hard to say goodbye to, the one coming up this week will be doubly hard.

I will move on to my birthday, I bought myself several presents this year.

The first being a Ninja blender, I have wanted one for several years and decided this was the year. It is amazing!! My smoothies are smoother and creamier and it is easier to get 4 cups of water in the thing. Perfect present to give myself.

Also the highlights in my hair are my present to myself. I am loving those as well.

Since I can’t make up my mind on the tattoo I am holding off.

So, now, the first day of my 30 days with no coffee. I feel bereft, I had to say goodbye to a dear friend and will not get to converse with them for a month. A whole month. It is so very sad, I am so lonely without my beloved.

I keep telling myself it is worth it, I will feel better, physically and mentally. Maybe not emotionally because I am bereft.

I am completely sold on the essential oil thing, they really do have healing properties. You know there is something to be said for holistic approaches. I am loving researching this, I believe everyone should take their own health in their hands.

Now, I’m not stupid, serious ailments should be seen by a Dr. However, I highly encourage everyone to do some research before getting ill. Like start now, before you’re sick.

I have to go now, I have essential oil capsules to take and lemon water to drink.

It’s My Birthday!

Time will either prove who you are, or who you aren’t. It’s up to you.

It’s my birthday! The day I look forward to all year, just because I believe the day one is born should be celebrated. I hope I have given my love of birthdays to my children, I know Elizabeth Anne has it.

The last few birthdays have not been pleasant ones in my household, this year it is back to my usual buoyant birthday mood. Even the animals seem happier, which is awesome, Stormie’s mood could be due to the fact I spilled some coffee and she lapped it up before I could get the dishtowel and clean it up.

A husky on caffeine, should I be worried? We shall see what the day brings.

I bought myself a few birthday presents, not the tattoo, I’m still trying to decide what I want, I know I want a Viking design with the number 13 incorporated, I can’t find the Viking design I want for an eternity.

I had highlights put in my hair, I bought a book on Vikings and one on Wonder Woman. I cannot wait to dive into them, I did stay up late last night reading the Viking one.

So, yesterday, I posted a picture of myself saying I make 54 look good. Someone said oh it’s the glasses, hinting that they are hiding my face therefore I look good. There is no other word but pissed. It pissed me off, there is no reason for anyone to be that obtuse to say something like that. So I posted a picture of me without glasses, to say I look good with or without glasses.

I mean seriously, why on earth would someone feel the need to say something like that. I have no idea, but I am really, well, pissed off. No other word for it at this point, I am past the point of niceties. I hope they learn their lesson and think about their actions and their words, you just don’t say something like that to people, especially to a woman.

Moving on, I am looking forward to spending this afternoon with great friends at a wonderful fashion show and luncheon. What a grownup I am! A luncheon, how awesome is that. I am of the age now where I lunch with friends, I think that is fantastic.

Now it is time to start getting ready for my afternoon, I hope you all have a fantastic day, go out and make it happen!

If anyone has any comments, criticisms or praise you can leave it here, or email me at angie@angieworld.com

Elizabeth Anne

So today, 29 years ago I got the best birthday present I’ve ever gotten in my entire life. Elizabeth Anne entered into this world and life was never the same.

I knew she was a girl before she was born, I knew she would have long dark hair and would be perfection. I was not wrong.

She is everything I could have wanted in a daughter. She is smart, loyal, funny, caring, strong and unbelievably beautiful.

I often say I don’t know what I did in life to deserve the children God gave me, I’m just happy He gave me the ones I have. They are all amazing humans.

I’m constantly amazed at Elizabeth’s life, all of her responsibilities, the strength she has to face them all. Both physically and mentally, I, of course, like to think I had something to do with how she turned out.

Elizabeth Anne, I hope you enjoy your day, it is fortuitous that you are a February girl. I am so happy we share the month. I love you beyond words.

Normalcy and Ally McBeal

Getting over the flu has not been easy, this past week I have been, well weak. I almost passed out twice in the shower, I don’t know if it was a combination of the heat and the steam or what. But today, I feel actually stronger than I have in a while.

Next week I will be back to my regular schedule, which includes working out. I am also doing my meal prep today, for the first time in quite a while.

This will consist of lemon pepper chicken, couscous and broccoli for lunch. Dinner will be salmon, sweet potato and broccoli. I am a creature of habit, since I don’t like cooking, making the same thing is easy for me. No, I don’t get bored, in fact I am a fan of sameness.

I really haven’t eaten a lot since getting sick, nothing has tasted good, that could account for the weakness last week.

I finally received my Doterra Cleanse package, I will be starting after my birthday. I really don’t feel like having a birthday celebration in the middle of a cleanse. It seems cruel, to myself, since I am not in the mood to be cruel to myself, after my birthday it is.

Back in the 1990s to early 2000s there was a show called Ally McBeal. I am going to admit I didn’t watch a lot of this show, just a once in a while kind of thing. When the shows I did watch were on hiatus and this was the only thing on that I hadn’t seen. This was in the days before streaming was around.

There is one episode that I saw that has stuck with me, after all this time, I still remember it. Ally had a client that wanted to be in a coma, she wanted to be medically induced. She wanted to live her life out in the coma, as her dream world was way better than her real life world.

She was older, she had never married and never had children, but in her dream world she was married, had children and even grandchildren.

She wanted to live in that world for the rest of her days. So off to court they go, with Ally leading the charge to enable her client to live out the rest of her life in a dream world.

I don’t remember the outcome of the episode, it was the premise that has stuck with me all of this time.

I live a lot in my head, and truth be told, what is in there, at times, is much better than what is out here.

Well, that used to be the case, not so much anymore, my real life is amazingly good these days.

But before April 2017, it was bad, and I did live a lot in my head and that life was imminently better that was going on in the real world. If faced with the opportunity to live in a coma or continue on in the world I was in at the time, I have to wonder what my decision would have been.

Considering I have amazing children and a granddaughter that very literally hung the moon, I would have chosen not to be in the coma.

However, if I didn’t have children or a granddaughter and the rest had been going on, I would have chosen the coma. A coma would have been preferable to what was going on in my life.

I do have a tendency to live a lot in my head, in my books and through my television shows. I don’t live a lot in the real world, I honestly don’t want to, people are not nice in the real world. In my head I can be interesting and beautiful, in the real world I am lesser than that.

The more I think about it the more I am convinced that I really won’t date again, simply due to the fact that there is no one that can stand up to what I believe Dean Cain is. I realize how crazy that sounds, and yet I don’t care.

If you have any comments or suggestions please feel free to leave them here or email me at angie@angieworld.com. Peace out peeps.

 

Flu and Dean Cain

It has been a long road to recovery, just for the record, I have not had the flu since 1994. Let that sink in folks, 1994, now 2018, it did me in, not literally, well, yes, literally. I did everything right, I wash my hands, I have antibacterial hand crap, I have Clorox wipes at my desk and yes, I use all of it. I still contracted the flu, and it was not pleasant.

I honestly thought it was a head cold, or sinus infection, when I went to the doctor and the nurse practitioner told me it was the flu you could have knocked me over with the proverbial feather.

I exclaimed, shut the door! She burst out laughing and said no one had ever reacted that way before. They probably won’t after me, I am unique.

Then she said it was too late for tamiflu, which is ok with me, as I don’t know what is in that stuff.

I combated the horrendous mess with oregano oil, tea tree oil, lemon oil, black elderberry stuff and peppermint. I also did the Tylenol for cold and sinus. Lots of liquids, not a lot of food, I wasn’t hungry, which is a great side effect. FYI.

But now, now that I am on the mend I have a giant fever blister on my upper lip.

I always know when the illness has left my body, or stress, because I get a giant fever blister.

I hate those things, with a passion, they are painful and ugly. So very ugly.

I still have a lingering cough as well, not too bad, but it’s there.

Since I have been housebound, I did manager to catch up on several streaming shows I have been wanting to watch. The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel on Amazon, The Handmaid’s Tale on Hulu and Stranger Things on Netflix, they are all very good and very different from each other.

I am incredibly eclectic in my television viewing, you might not be, if you are into Sci-Fi, Stranger Things is what you want. If you liked The Hunger Games, The Handmaid’s Tale is for you. Gilmore Girls fans, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel is the cup of tea you are looking for.

I am now dying to find out what happens next on each of these and their new seasons aren’t out yet!

The most amazing thing happened this morning people, Dean Cain, yes, the real Dean Cain, liked my tweet! Again!

I am one step closer to meeting him, and having him fall madly in love with me and then we get married.

Stop! It could happen! I’m not crazy, my mother had me tested. That is my mantra, once again, I’m not stupid and I know it’s not going to happen, but what if it did. Who would be the crazy one then?

On a happier note, I feel better today than I have in over a week and will be returning to work tomorrow.

I had a party to go to tonight, but I won’t be able to do that and I am not happy about it. I was looking forward to it and even had the perfect pair of boots picked out. Oh well, there is always next time.

As usual, if you have any comments, especially any essential oils that will make the fever blister go away, feel free to leave them here or shoot me an email. angie@angieworld.com

Things I’m Angry About Right Now

There are a couple of things that have me really angry right now. Angry isn’t the right word, you know what, it’s old fashioned pissed off.

First off, I have not been sick in years and now I have a low grade fever, sinus something, I don’t even know what, coughing and I am losing my voice. I am doing oregano oil, frankincense oil, lemon oil, geranium oil, eucalyptus oil and hot lemon and honey. Add the Tylenol extra strength night time cold plus medication and it is way pleasant right now.

I even did a bought in my sauna with the eucalyptus oil, all I did was get sweaty, I thought I would sweat this stuff out, no dice. I have even tried the faceblaster, it is supposed to be great when it comes to sinus issues.

I may have to break down and go to the doctor. I hate going to the doctor, I have to literally be on death’s door before I will go. Oh add vitamin D to that list.

That’s the first thing, the second thing is a little for egregious, in my opinion.

I talk about this all of the time, this is not a huge secret, I am adopted, I was adopted by my great aunt and uncle. Great being the operative word in so many areas, but in this instance, age. I have stated before my dad was born in 1911 and my mom was born in 1913. This is not a secret. I have two nephews older than I, my siblings are way older, 28, 24 and 20 years older. Not a secret, my brother that just passed in August was a great-grandfather, again, not a secret.

So then why am I getting this whole oh I thought the person you call your nephew was your cousin crap. When I say um his mom is my sister, this person acted like they didn’t believe me. Would you like to see my adoption papers? I was legally adopted, I have the papers, I also have my birth certificate saying who my parents are. They match my siblings.

This is the kind of stuff I grew up with, oh it’s Angie, she isn’t real, kind of crap. I don’t need that from a near stranger, we might have gone to the same school, in the same hometown, but apparently you don’t know me at all.

Yes, this person acted like they didn’t believe me when I said my sister is my sister. Oh, she’s so much older than us, me: I was adopted. Her: oh I know but still. But still what? Why would I lie about that? Seriously, this is not something one says to an adoptee. My sister is my sister, my nephews and my neice are my mine, my brothers are my brothers. I have the paperwork to prove it, just in case anyone is interested.

We may not talk every day, but I love them all, with my whole heart. So to come at me like that, so not cool. Oh I deleted that person off of my Facebook, I don’t need that kind of person knowing anything about me.

Thanks for listening, this has been a fever induced rant, but it has been brewing for a few weeks.

As usual, comment here or at angie@angieworld.com. Until next time, peace, love and gossip. Extra points for anyone who knows where that line comes from.

My Thoughts on Today

I was going to write about some things I have recently tried and loved and then I remembered it is Martin Luther King jr., day.

Here in the United States of America that means we take pause today to honor a great American who believed in equality for all. Not for the few, not for certain religions, not for certain skin colors, for ALL.

Now that is something I can get behind, equality for all, I like that, I do believe, with my whole heart it is something the majority of Americans wants as well.

I grew up in a non-racist household, what that means is my parents taught me to judge what is on the inside, not the outside. Having said that, I will tell you my dad was prejudiced, he was a product of his generation in many ways, having been born in 1911 this is to be expected.

My dad had no issues with people of a different skin color getting to vote, getting the same pay for the same job, being friends with people of a different skin color. He did not believe that we should intermarry. That is the only thing he had issues with. I am sure if he lived longer or had lived in a different time, he would have seen things differently.

My mother, who outlived him by 10 years, did change her opinion on this as she met and became friends with people of a different skin color.

I believe if people are exposed to different cultures and different ethnicities they will begin to think differently.

I don’t believe in the whole “race” thing, we are all one race, the human race. We might look differently and speak differently and think differently, but inside, where it genuinely counts, we all want the same thing. For this world to be better for our children, to be able to feed, clothe and shelter our families in a dignified manner.

I believe that if we all united and refused to be drawn into the “race” wars, we would defeat the real enemy.

When we stop looking at each other and fearing skin color, religion, region or accents, then we can truly stop the hate.

The hate that Martin Luther King jr. wanted to stop so many years ago. Today, of all days of the year, the way we can honor him is to truly stop giving our attention to the ones that want to divide us. Stop looking for differences and start looking for the sameness in all of us. A desire to elevate our children higher than we climbed, a desire to live in peace, a desire to truly love one another.

As a Christian all I can do is look to what Jesus said in John 13:34 “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.”

No room for hate in my heart if I follow that commandment, which I try my best to do on a daily basis. Someone recently told me that they know someone is truly bad if I don’t like them, because I like everyone. I do try and find something positive in every person around me, if I can’t find anything positive about you, it has nothing to do with your skin color. It has everything to do with your character.

If you have any comments, criticisms or really anything you want to say to me, you can do so here in the comments or email me at angie@angieworld.com.

Happy Anniversary Foy and Odela

January 13, one of my favorite days of the year, why, you ask, well I’m glad you did. It is the day that started everything, January 13, 1934, Foy and Odela went to the Justice of the Peace and promised in front of God and everyone to love, honor, be faithful, loyal and remain true to one another for a life time.

That they did, with a dignity and grace that is rarely seen these days. I know I have a tendency to romanticize things from my childhood, but these are the two humans I don’t have to exaggerate or give them qualities that they didn’t possess.

They were and continue to be my model for what true, romantic love looks like. They were the epitome of sharing, caring, laughter, love and discipline. They were truly perfect in my eyes, they always will be.

They lived through some of the hardest times this country has ever seen and came out without any bitterness or anger. They loved this country fiercely, just as fiercely as they loved one another.

My parents didn’t have to adopt me, they chose to, it was a daunting task, taking in a pre-teen with a bad attitude. They did, the attitude changed, the stubbornness did not, They told me they had no regrets, I believe them, the last words my mother ever said to me was I had been the best surprise.

I miss them every day of my life.

Today, on what would be their 84th anniversary, I know that it is truly special as they now have their youngest son with them to celebrate. I have said before, I don’t believe they are looking down on me and their other children left here on earth. Some things would make them sad, and there is no sadness in heaven, and trust me, those two are in heaven. There is no doubt in anyone’s mind that my parents ended up anywhere else.

So there they are, in heaven, having a coconut cake to celebrate. My brother is there to help them eat the cake today, I know that makes the celebration that much sweeter.